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I’ve been thinking about the pleasures for me of following this site, as well as the occasional problems. I have a fair bit of daily pain from scoliosis and the other aspects of Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, which I have had since age 12. It means that I am often stuck sitting down reading or looking at a computer screen. My guess it that I am not the only regular poster who also uses the site as an interesting (and potentially helpful) way to fill in time when health issues intrude.
I would be interested to hear from other regular posters who value the site, for their own purposes as well as to be helpful. How does ‘helping’, help you too?

I joined back in 2017 or 2018 when I was caregiver for my husband who had Parkinson's. Since his passing in 2023 I've continued to read and sometimes contribute. I benefited from advice and support, and have learned a lot about a variety of topics that has come in handy, if not for myself than for others I know.

I agree with others that there are a lot more postings by people seeking financial help and wonder what kind of algorithm is driving them to this site. It's too bad the forum doesn't have something like a "sticky" that I've seen on other sites that has standing information that's always at the top. For the Forum it should lay out what is and isn't appropriate to post about. For example, it could say that businesses can't solicit; that individuals can't find financial help here (but direct them generically for possible sources of help).
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I started here maybe 2015? A friend had a Yahoo group and she posted something from this site.

This group helped me understand Medicaid which made it so much easier to apply for Mom. She went into AL in 2016 and transitioned to LTC in 2017. I got so much good info. I continued to stay feeling maybe I could help others. I worked for 7 years with Nurses as their Secretary and my daughter has worked 20 yrs in LTC as an RN, 10 yrs before that as an LPN. So I learned things on the job and from my daughter.

Margaret we are not the only ones who have done their caring and remained to help others.
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I found the site while questioning some issues when helping my dad. It was a great help with good guidance and tips. Like others, I’ve stayed to hopefully help others. I’ve also seen unfortunate changes, posters only wanting financial help, others who lash out when not hearing exactly what they want to be told, and more advertising leaking in. What I’ve learned here has also been good for me, early on I came to see that others sadly had awful parents who’d abused, neglected, or entirely misconstrued what parenting should be. It’s made me more empathetic and grateful for the parents I had. I’m glad to read and learn, and hopefully contribute something of value. It’s a good group, like any other there are some nuts in the tree, but on the whole a kind and helpful bunch
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I'm relatively new to the forum, maybe 8 months and in just that short time, I've noticed a big difference as you point out especially the drift away from "true" caregiving questions. I still find wonderful advice and lots of tidbits of help from the "core" group here. I hope you will all stay. I guess all the financial help questions are a mirror to how many are living, esp now.

Thanks to all for sharing their experiences and helpful, sometimes funny and very direct advice! I like that. :) :)
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Two of my step children also have Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome which isn't easy to deal with.

I've used the forum to help me navigate the chaos I was feeling having 2 elderly parents to manage as an only child. I'd gotten lots of support and guidance with those situations that helped me a lot. And then dealing with their passing as well.

I also found great comfort from most of the forum members here when dealing with my husbands liver transplant and then my own cancer journey the past 3.5 years. I'm now forced to sit a lot to manage the permanent injuries I've suffered from immunotherapy, so A.C. is a good place for me to come and be helpful to others.

Although so many changes have taken place nowadays and so many questions are about getting financial help for new roofs and broken down cars and pumping septic tanks instead of true caregiving issues. The questions have dwindled, the IT issues have ramped up, and A.C. is no longer what it once was. I find that sad, watching folks leave here never to return. It was once a bustling place full of hot topics and I fondly remember those days. I contribute when I can though, and intend to continue doing so.
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This site was a real blessing to me when I came across it some years back. I was miserable in my family caregiver situation and found so much support and kindness here from people who had lived in similar situations. I like to read the different posts here and if I can help a person by my years in hands-on care or through my own life experience, I'm glad to do it. People helped me and I like to pay it forward.

There have been a few times people on this forum told me what I needed to hear and even when it isn't sugar-coated, if it's done in the spirit of friendship and a genuine desire to be helpful, it shows and is appreciated. When it's not then that is just some pathetic fool entertaining themselves with a bit of bullying. Of course like anything public you'll get people who like to cause trouble or who give advice on topics they really know nothing about and have no practical experience with. I don't name names.

For the most part, this group is very helpful and a good, valuable resource for anyone who is a caregiver or is in need of some support from others who are currently caregiving or have been through it.
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For several years I viewed it as my volunteer activity, helping caregivers by sharing first hand experiences or searching the web for information they weren't able to find themselves. But there are less people asking for practical advice today and my experiences are dated, so trolling the site now is more of a habit and a tenuous connection with a handful of people like me who have been here forever.
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Yes, posting here has helped me for a few years now.
It gives me insight of what I should be thankful for; things which I could've done differently or better, and it's okay to have moments of every single feeling that comes with caregiving, aging, and progression of illnesses, and how we truly try....
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I'm now helping my friend when the kids can't drive her to appointments. She's 98 and still very healthy and engaging.
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Good question Margaret.

When I was dealing with mom's declining health this site was a Godsend for me. I don't think I would have survived without it.

I don't post much anymore but I do check in periodically. I always wonder how my old friends on here are doing. Most have left or don't post as much but there are still some old favorites that do.

Helping definitely helps. I truly believe that taking care of my mom was my purpose and when she died I not only missed her but missed caring for her as well, even though it was so difficult at times.
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