I do not have a great relationship with my MIL yet I have cared for her from time to time. She is in almost perfect however plays the guilt card and is desperate for attention from my husband. We live in different countries however he wants to relocate her to where we are and that terrifies me.
I know I'll end up being her carer.
Even if I don't I resent the time she is going to take away from our lives, I hate the fact that hubby will end up popping in daily and spending every weekend visiting, there goes our spare time.
And in this new country she would have no one else and be completely dependant on us.
Am I right to worry? What sort of strain will this put on our relationship?
If she has any interests, at all, is there any possibility that your husband could find a place for her to express those (like a knitting club if she likes to knit, for one example). While it's not your job to do this, maybe it's something to consider helping him with if he doesn't seem to get around to it but with your relationship being shaky with her, he really should be the one to bring it to her as his idea.
I'm just saying that it would be good to try to think of anything at all that could help her spend her free time. Keep in-mind that your husband might have to help her figure out the local transportation or you've just added "chauffeur" to his to-do list.