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My elderly mom has terminal LC. she has been failing the past few weeks and now the past few days, I can no longer transfer her from bed to potty chair. Mom refuses to use the bathroom in her pull ups and really can not aide me with the bedpan. She goes before my husband leaves for work about 6 am and holds herself till he gets home about 6-7 pm!!! She is miserable, needless to say !! I am so concerned about UTI's from this but just can not convince her it is OK . Any suggestions on how to handle this ? breaks my heart , she says she is not dead yet and does not want to be a nasty old lady..

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Yes, we do have hospice. An aide comes in 2x each week to bathe her. Haven't heard about any other services I could get as far as personal help goes..
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Would she consent to having a catheter? Tell her that many old ladies use pull ups and lots who are not so young either. There is nothing nasty about using them. Also most men young and old are incontinent after having their prostates removed. And you would never know it seeing a smartly dressed business man. She's clearly so close to the end of life have you considered hospice. They will send an aide in most days to help you.
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Call Suncoast Hospice and get her MD to issue a referral.
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