For the past couple years, along with her husband, I've been helping care for my dearest friend who is in the latter stages of Parkinson's. (In this stage of the disease, my friend is nearly bed bound and is suffering from some cognitive decline; she's vulnerable). Anyway, I've requested to not be paid; to me, this is an act of friendship, and I wouldn't take a dime for the joy I get just being there. Two months ago they hired a woman (an acquaintance of mine) to work 2 afternoons per week so that I can take some time away. "Gina" texts my friend every single day, sending photos of her children and updates about what she's doing when she's not there with my friend. She's told my friend stories about how she was sexually abused as a child. My friend then tells me that "Gina" has had a very hard life, so that's why they are paying her even more than they were originally. "Gina" has plans to bring one of her children over so he can sing to my friend. She also runs treats over to their apartment on her days off. In other words, my gut says that "Gina" is "love-bombing" my friend and her husband and becoming enmeshed in their lives, and it doesn't sit well with me that she has shared such intimate details of her life with them. I know she's not from an agency, but that seems to me to be very unprofessional. Am I off-base? Does this seem odd to anyone else?
Do they have adult children or other family in the will? A poa in case he’s incapacitated? Someone to at least act as the husband’s agent between he and Gina? I wouldn’t be surprised if sex tactics are next. Both my next door neighbors dad and my uncle were paying for caregivers with benefits.
As his friend, I would tell him all the ways Gena is a red flag and possibly even stay there more while assisting him in finding a replacement and setting rules of professionalism similar to what an agency would have. No bringing kids to work. No talking about sex at work. No going off to work to drop off treats when you’re not working. Stuff like that.
Just because there’s no agency doesn’t mean people can’t insist on professionalism. Gena has already been rewarded with more money for her hard luck story. That wouldn’t happen with a professional. Gena is now scheming on bringing the kids over. See above.