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How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
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Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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Celebrate an early holiday with your mother. She’s 95, you’ve enjoyed A LOT of holidays together over the years. Spend the actual holiday with your son and grandchild. You won’t regret it. Hate to say it because I don’t know if I can say it nicely but now that you arena grandparent, you should enjoy being a grandparent and try to make as many memories with your grandchildren as possible. Like I said, your mom is 95 and there’s a lifetime of memories there. My prespective comes from the loss of my MIL at the young age of 68, she won’t be making any more memories with her grandchildren. You never know what will happen. If your mom has a smart phone or a tablet, perhaps you could video chat with her from your sons house?
Between a rock and a hard place. Can Mom go with u to son's? I like suggested, an early celebration. We used to spend TG with DHs family. Because we spent Christmas Eve with my Mom. My MIL didn't cook on Christmas because we all ate at SILs Dads back then. Then MIL moved to Fla. Holidays were for my kids so didn't travel that 2 day drive.
Visit your mother the weekend before the holiday and celebrate with her, take a few photos, the go to a Walgreens/Walmart/etc and print a photo or a photo collage with a "Thanksgiving/Christmas 2019" label, place it in a frame and leave it with your mother. During the actual holiday mom can point to the photo and tell herself and others you visited her last week. Spend the actual holiday with your son and his family. Give your mother a call the morning of the actual holiday and if possible, see if someone in the extended family, church, neighbors, or circle of friends can stop by for a short visit. Holidays are a season, not just a day.
Maybe for Christmas you consider purchasing a digital photo frame and loading it with photos of her grandson and his family you took at Thanksgiving. My mother loves to push the button on her frame and watch the "show" for hours.
I'm an only also and I understand the challenges and concerns. This is a great place to find great ideas. Are you asking if you should bring her to your place for the holidays? Or go visit her at her place for the holidays? How old are you and are you retired? More info would be helpful.
Maybe celebrate the holidays at her place prior (like a week or 2 before). Maybe it's just you and you can FaceTime your son + family for a 10-minute chat. If you stay with your mom for a few days you'd probably get your eyes opened as to whether she is truly "very independent" or if you're just unaware of her actual functionality (physical and mental).
Can you go up to get her before the holidays and bring her in for a stay, then return her after? I don't think you'd be able to manage this "remotely" as someone needs to help her get packed up, unless you have a relationship with a trusted neighbor of hers... I have this arrangement with 2 very senior LOs in FL, and I'm in MN.
Is there someplace your mom can go locally to her to celebrate the holidays? Does she belong to a place of worship? Or a senior center? Or even a NH even though she's not a resident (does she have any friends still alive in a nearby NH?)
Ok, here’s an idea for you. It’s what we do. The Holidays are (supposed to be, anyway) about get-togethers with family. I get that. In our family, we celebrate with my son and his family on Christmas Eve at his house, 45 minutes away. It’s a great time; casual with good food. games, love and laughter. Then, they are free to celebrate Christmas Day with my DIL’s family. My daughter and her family comes to our house on Christmas for a more formal, get-together.
If your plans would involve much travel and overnights, then do your celebrationss over a few weeks. Heck, nowadays everyone starts celebrating Christmas in August anyway, so there’s no need to nail down all your celebrations to one day. Family needs to be understanding and flexible.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
mother. She’s 95, you’ve enjoyed A LOT of holidays together over the years. Spend the actual holiday with your son and grandchild. You won’t regret it. Hate to say it because I don’t know if I can say it nicely but now that you arena grandparent, you should enjoy being a grandparent and try to make as many memories with your grandchildren as possible. Like I said, your mom is 95 and there’s a lifetime of memories there. My prespective comes from the loss of my MIL at the young age of 68, she won’t be making any more memories with her grandchildren. You never know what will happen. If your mom has a smart phone or a tablet, perhaps you could video chat with her from your sons house?
Maybe for Christmas you consider purchasing a digital photo frame and loading it with photos of her grandson and his family you took at Thanksgiving.
My mother loves to push the button on her frame and watch the "show" for hours.
Maybe celebrate the holidays at her place prior (like a week or 2 before). Maybe it's just you and you can FaceTime your son + family for a 10-minute chat. If you stay with your mom for a few days you'd probably get your eyes opened as to whether she is truly "very independent" or if you're just unaware of her actual functionality (physical and mental).
Can you go up to get her before the holidays and bring her in for a stay, then return her after? I don't think you'd be able to manage this "remotely" as someone needs to help her get packed up, unless you have a relationship with a trusted neighbor of hers... I have this arrangement with 2 very senior LOs in FL, and I'm in MN.
Is there someplace your mom can go locally to her to celebrate the holidays? Does she belong to a place of worship? Or a senior center? Or even a NH even though she's not a resident (does she have any friends still alive in a nearby NH?)
Blessings!
If your plans would involve much travel and overnights, then do your celebrationss over a few weeks. Heck, nowadays everyone starts celebrating Christmas in August anyway, so there’s no need to nail down all your celebrations to one day. Family needs to be understanding and flexible.