I’m 24 and I take care of both my elderly parents. Between both of them, their doctor appointments & physical therapy appointments fill up my calendar. They have appointments five days out of the week.
This has been going on for two years already. The elderly services in my state only provide transportation if the individual can transfer from vehicles on their own.
How do other caregivers manage multiple appointments every week?
Being in a wheelchair does not in itself mean that either parent needs care. I have worked with ‘wheelies’ long enough to be quite clear about that! Don’t believe that you don’t need a career because you will inherit the house. It’s one more step along the path to insanity.
I am ‘in my late 70s’ and have some quite difficult physical conditions. I cannot imagine expecting either of my daughters (in their late 40s with school age children of their own) to be a live in maid/carer! They are not ‘responsible for me’. That is ridiculous, as it is for you. I think you need to see a counselor to get your head around this bizarre situation.
both of my parents are heavily disabled, and can only walk a short distance hence the need for physical therapy multiple times a week.
Kathryn, at age 24 if you are organising appointments 5 days of the week, you have no time for a life of your own. No time to work, study, date, have fun … in fact do anything worthwhile to set up your own life. If this is the level of care that your parents genuinely need (and it probably isn’t) they need to pay for some sort of care that doesn’t involve ruining you. Be a bit more hard-nosed about this. An old expression says 'the life you need to save may be your own'.
For example , what their conditions are , what kinds of doctors they go to . Their ages .
The answers may be in deciding if it’s really necessary to go so often . Perhaps they would qualify for a visiting nurse to come take blood pressures etc . Perhaps the lab could come to the house to draw blood tests .
Are you not able to work because of this ?
Do your parents have money to hire someone to take them to the doctor ?
If they moved to assisted living many provide transportation to doctors as well as they have many services there , primary doctor . Podiatry . Vision , dental , PT, OT , speech , psych therapy , lab , portable X-ray . They could possibly only need to leave to see specialist like cardiology , neurology , etc .
You are too young to be tied down to this . You need your life .
Do your parents take care of themselves otherwise . What else are you helping with , shopping , cooking , cleaning , laundry. Do you live with them ?
I live with them, and do all the necessary house work. My father is still able to drive, so that is one thing he can do. They don’t want to live in assisted living, so I am responsible for them.
The excessive doctors appointments are dental for teeth implants, Wound care, Physical Therapy (3x week), and Eye Care. Because they are both diabetic, they go to the eye doctor and wound care often.
When you look at a calendar and see a week with no appointments, something always comes up.
I don't understand it. I don't get it. And I vowed to myself I'm not living just to go from one appointment to another.
Sorry that turned into me venting back on you.
As for how do I handle it. I guess the answer is , not very well. I'm only taking care of one parent. I don't think I could handle 2.
I advised my LO needed other solutions. A new plan for transport. Maybe Assisted Living where the Doctor came to them.
Then I quit.
PS Then my LO did find other solutions.