My mother has had primary progressive MS for 30 years and has been in nursing home care for 15 years. Most recently she had several infections that evolved into sepsis. The doctor said that she’d need a long course of antibiotics to fully beat the infection. We didn’t move forward with that (aligning with dr recommendations and mother’s wishes).
She chose comfort care and so we’ve been in hospice for about 2 weeks now. Every day is a roller coaster. She continues to drink fluids and eat very small amounts of food. We see no indications of infection (normal vital signs and no fever). She is miserable and bed bound. Barely able to speak. She says she just wants this all to end.
Has anyone experienced any similar issues with a loved one? Does it make sense to encourage her to stop intake of food and water? She has suffered so much and it is torture to see her in this state. Scared it will just continue on indefinitely.
I’m getting to a place of peace in all of this. She was alert and we had some beautiful chats yesterday. Thankful for this time.
I can't give you an answer as to when it will all end. It's a daily rollercoaster, and whenever the nurses at her place call to say she hasn't eaten anything in a couple of days, I think "well, this is it," and the next day she's up and sitting in her wheelchair slugging back her milkshakes. She's lost at least 30 pounds since mid-December and she doesn't know us most days, but she's still strong enough to take a swing at the nurses when they bother her, and her vital signs are banging along just fine.
She's in no pain, but she has zero quality of life.
I can't give you any answers, but I can commiserate with you. Hang in there, and just know that one day it'll be over. Take one day at a time -- it's what I've learned to do.