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hello all, my dad who has advanced dementia after 2 strokes, is being cared for at home. He can no longer use his lower body. He hates being moved to use the commode or toilet or shower. It's like torture for him. We have a lift transfer chair and it helps alot. Im getting him another wheelchair with built in commode, this wheelchair can also recline all the way back like a stretcher so he can lay down. Now comes the question...i know it's dangerous to sit too long on the toilet. But is it ok to sometimes just let him be diaper free and recline in that wheelchair with the commode? (he had prostate surgery before that made him lost control of his bladder, so urine would drip at all times.) wouldn't being diaper free sitting on the commode be good to air things out?? Did anyone here ever did something like that? Thank you so much!

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You say the lift chair is like torture for him
Is that due to pain and discomfort or fear?
If it is due to pain maybe a Hoyer Lift would be easier on him the whole body sling would cradle him rather than a harness and lifting him (I am guessing the lift chair is like the Sit to Stand I used for my Husband.)
Also if it is due to pain if he is taking pain meds would it be possible to time changes around medication so about the time the pain meds kick in you have to change him.
The Suprapubic catheter is not like the condom catheter. The Suprapubic is surgically done. It would not be viable option if he would pull at it.
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You know, the truth is that this is a gentleman who no longer has normal bowel function, nor will he ever again have it.
Therefore, whatever works best for HIM and for the CAREGIVERS is what goes.
Be certain to use stool softeners and consider citrucel it this can be given. It both supplies roughage for an urge to go and a sort of mucilagenous lining that makes stool pass with ease. It also tends to give a normal semi formed stool.
This is a time for experimentation as to what works for a particular individual, and much like a "bad back" the remedies are almost always as unique and diverse as an individual's fingerprint.
Good luck.
Don't worry at this late stage about "too long on the toilet". That's for a younger group.
Best of luck.
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superminh May 7, 2024
Thank you so much for your helpful advice!! We will experiment to see what will be most comfortable for him and managable for us! You've put my mind at ease...and yeah..it's a stressful time and I appreciate you taking the time to share your advice!
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Why not use incontinence briefs. Tab type would be best in this case and just change him in bed. That way there is no need to move him for toileting. A shower chair that can be rolled into the shower (if that is possible in your home) but a Hoyer Lift would make putting him in the shower chair would be more comfortable.
Has there been any discussion of a Suprapubic catheter? As with anything there are Pro's and Con's.
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superminh May 7, 2024
Thank you for your answer! right now we use the diapers with tabs. we do have a lifting and transfer chair that will place him on a bidet so we can wash him thoroughly with water, rather than just wiping in bed. His dementia is making him fearful and upset everytime we reposition him in bed, or move him. He absolutely hated the external catherer and we couldn't put it on. But yes...we'll see how things will go.
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