I just read a question someone asked about grieving during the holidays and experiencing those firsts after someone you love has passed away. My problem is that I am grieving over the loss of my husband who is suffering from late stage Alzheimer’s and for the first time will not be here with me at home during the season. I see him every day, but all traces of the wonderful man he once was are gone. I dread the season frankly and find myself hiding my true feelings from my children. I have a wonderful family and lots of grandchildren around me, but my heart is so sad. Every first time this year has been so painful....but the holidays which at one time were so wonderful hold little prospect of joy for me now.
everywhere I go I think back to the time I was there with my mother & we had fun & good times...& those fun, good times are in the rear view mirror...& now most of the time now she’s soooo abusive...verbally & physically. It’s getting harder & harder to manage her at home without me getting injured...since she refuses her meds or they stopped working. 🤗 hugs
I hope someone who is going through the exact same thing will answer you with advice. My advice for grief is don't fight it. When it hits you, ride the wave. Don't hide it. There isn't anything wrong with grieving as long as you don't let it take over your life. Grief is a product of love. It's healthy for your children and grandchildren to see it- even if it makes them uncomfortable. It's healthy. It's normal. And if you don't fight it, it gets easier to bear. Best wishes to you as you get through the next few months.
Enjoy your family. Toast your husband. Set a placesetting, he will be there in spirit.
(((((Hugs)))))