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The doctor just gave Al another med which is supposed to help with his memory loss. It's expensive but we have good insurance. Sometimes I have to remind him where we're going. He still drives, but I don't know for how much longer. I don't know what we'll do when he can't, because I don't drive at all.
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My husband has always misplaced things, even before his PD diagnosis.. But it has increased since his retirement. I try to think of it as a treasure hunt. But I think I will order some of those "Tiles" and link them to my cell so we can find his wallet, his keys, his cell (which he forgets to charge,) etc. I would put them on his glasses if I could. He has 4 pair, and constantly loses them. He does fine during the day (except for losing things) but sundowns in the evenings. What is hard is to watch this intelligent man whom I love descend into dementia. And I cannot do anything about it, plus I have health challenges of my own. I want him home as long as possible, but I'm not sure how long I can care for him. Any advice about what Medicare will pay for?
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My husband was put on the Excelon patch, which I thought helped him. But he didn't like how it made him feel, so he quit using it. Now he wants off the Stalevo. And he is stubborn as a mule. It is HIS health, not mine, and he needs the autonomy to make his own decisions as long as he can. So I try not to interfere. But it is hard.
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Sunny, can he still reason? If so, perhaps you can get him to understand that his health is also yours -- that you need him to be well as long as possible in order to be a companion for you. My husband understands this, but in my case, he only understands the financial problems involved, not the emotional. Whatever, it keeps him doing what the neurologist tells him to do. Maybe men can't understand how attached we are emotionally to them? How long have you been married? We've been married 57 years. I don't know what I'll do without him.
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Yes, he can still reason, at least during the day. But as I said, he's very stubborn. And I feel very strongly that he should keep his autonomy as long as he can. We've only been married since 2008, but have been living together since 1993. We married because we realized after my mom died that we might need to make legal decisions for each other. The commitment has always been there. We are lucky. Our house and cars are paid for, I have a wonderful daughter (and her husband) from a previous marriage. And I have a large circle of supportive friends, four of whom who have helped me this week. I wish my husband had that, but his friends and former colleagues are scattered (he is an archaeologist and a pretty solitary person.) The progression of the PD has sped up since his retirement 1 1/2 years ago. He has always been happiest when out working "in the field," as they say. Now he can't. He is a strong man, and what I fear is that his body will keep on going long after his mind quits. Then I will have to decide what to do next. I'm not sure what Medicare and insurance will pay for.
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My dad has had PD since 2009. Yes everyday is a treasure hunt for things that he moves around constantly. He sleeps very easily, falling asleep in his chair watching TV. Night time goes easy so far. I am lucky considering what you all are going through. I do have to do almost everything for him (except hygiene - glad he still is able to do that. His legs are having a hard time moving at times, and again, thank goodness it is only that so far. His thinking is not totally correct, but his memory for long term is much better than short. I notice he doesn't remember much that I have told him or talked to him about. Thanks for all your discussions. It is a big help to read what may happen. I am trying to keep him home as long as we can, which means I only can work part time and even then not sure how much longer I am able to leave him alone to do that. I keep hoping this is the worse things will get, but one never does know. Hang in there everyone! And thanks for being so helpful.
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Sunny, Sounds like he needs a reason to keep going. Al finally retired for the 3rd time last September and he's going downhill faster since then. He has more trouble pulling things from his memory to his mouth now. (For those who don't know, Al has a PhD in pharmacology - took early retirement at 55, reactivated his pharmacy license and worked as a pharmacist since then.) Perhaps we need to give our men a reason for living. Al's reason is that he understands that when he dies, I become a pauper -- maybe even homeless. So he is trying to be as healthy as he can. He goes to the gym 3 times a week because his doctor told him to, and is careful to take his meds as prescribed. He does crossword puzzles because she told him it would help keep his mind active. Perhaps you need to find what your husband needs to make him want to live and be well. Good luck to you. I may not have a "husband" but when he looks for company, he is still my best friend.
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My husband has also had PD for some time. He is 75 and 3 years ago I had to find a nursing home for him. Unable to walk and talk clearly. Oddly, he has no dementia. His doctor doesn't go by stages so I'm finding this conversation interesting. Even if it's an age old one.
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Al is frightened now because he woke up and can't remember going to bed. He had undressed, put on his mask and got under the covers but he just can't remember doing that. However, he had no problem finding his way to the dentist this morning. But this is the one he hadn't been to in 7 years, so that's long term memory. I guess I was tired from the long session because I fell asleep on the couch and burned up the stewed tomatoes I was making for tonight. He's still asleep so he doesn't yet know how bad the house smells!! Maybe by tomorrow he won't remember that I ruined his supper -- sometimes losing short term memory is a good thing : )
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Aside from just the fanny pack, if he just dropped his cell phone, then he might not remember to replace it in the fanny pack. I'm not saying the fanny pack won't be useful, just not to depend on it. If you can find a way to physically attach the phone with a lanyard or something, even if he drops it, it's still attached. I'm sure there must be products for this but, at the minimum, I can imagine attaching a rope to it and tying the thing to something like his belt so that, if he drops it, it's not crashing to the ground nor getting left behind.
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Thanks, Geo, but I think he would bulk with that, or leave home without tying it on. Right now, it's a daily search for his car keys. Are we having fun yet?
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I think someone else in the thread might have mentioned locators that you can attach to things, especially to keys, and I vaguely think you might be able to find something like that at Lillian Vernon catalogue or something like that.
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I think that new catalogue should be arriving any day now so I'll go look for that. Thanks.
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With Parkinsons's the smallest of tasks can become monumental, leaving your loved one frustrated and helpless. Sometimes, it helps very much for the caregiver to just get it done, so you can move on to more pleasant things. Just give him less to keep track of.
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My husband would like to carry a wallet but I keep it in my purse. He has missed placed it and several other things ,so I keep track of everything that is important. Someday are better then others for him. He has had Parkinson's for 7 years now. unable to drive because it reflex's are to slow. and his walking is not for a long distance.
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