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If the daughter caring for this lady is an RN, she is susceptible to having her license removed if caught abusing anybody, never mind her own mother. Read up online about the ethics and licensing requirements for RN where-ever you live. Document, document, document. Tell sis in writing what needs to be done, what you observed, lay down a paper trail so that you can provide it to social services and licensing board. Regarding social worker not showing up, again, document the calls, leave messages that you are documenting/recording the request calls; write and fax so there is a paper trail. Notify the social services office of your documentation. Prepare to litigate. When people learn you are documenting to this level, most will perk up and pay closer attention.
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Thanks to everyone. Sophe, you are absolutely right. It was the overwhelming documentation that I believe forced sis to finally provide the care mom should have been getting 6 months ago. I had sent a message to everyone in the family again, first stating that sis was solely responsible, and that I was not, then detailing all the things I had been doing, noting it helped not just mom, but sis, too. Said I wasn't available to provide care without 24/7 help, that I expected it in place and that if it wasn't, and something did happen to mom, sis would be the one responsible. It took another few days, but the day care workers hours were changed, and between the 2 of them, they are now providing round-the-clock care in mom's home. That's all we wanted all along.
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It is interesting to note that the caregiver's logbook, a spiral bound notebook where the day workers and I were keeping notes and information about mom's condition, doctor's visits, in home nursing visits, etc, has disappeared. There's a new pad of loose paper they are now using. One of the care workers said BIL took the prior logs away. Lots of details about the neglect and abusive behaviour, along with valuable observations, was in there. Doubt I'll ever see that again. Meant to copy it, but didn't get the chance. But I have my own notes anyway.
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