I am the primary caretaker for my mother who is in a private independent care facility--but she is hardly independent. I have a nurse in with her Monday through Friday, but on weekends and evenings either I'm with her most of the time or a member of my family when I'm sick. Yesterday when I went to see her I discovered the facility wouldn't let me in at all--only medical personnel. My mom just got out of the hospital due to congestive heart failure and she has advancing Alzheimer's. I can't believe I can't even get in to see her.
You might find this article interesting regarding an 89 yr old survivor of covid-19 in Washington.
I understand it's hard, however, it only takes one person to start a huge problem! It's not worth the risk!
Use this time as a respite.
Hang in there!
One documented community spread was caused when a father who "might" have been exposed through travel was instructed to self quarantine at home for 14 days decided since he wasn't feeling sick to attend his daughter's recital with his family at around day 10. His family left the recital after being informed he had tested positive during the event. Later tests showed his wife and one child were also positive (infected while he quarantined at home), and the three of them infected several people who were in attendance at the recital.
The reason medical personal are being allowed greater access than the body public is the assumption trained medical personal are more likely to follow directions than people like the father wanting to attend a recital.
I think what others suggested, phone and letters, are very good ideas. Perhaps they could also let her see you via skype or something? I understand they are doing it for the right reasons but perhaps they should have warned relatives before, so I wouldn't be shy, try to ask them.
Sending you and your mom lots of encouragement through this difficult time.
That's not to suggest that you're not caring for yourself; it's a reflection of what resources the medical profession had, before shortages.
Can you call your mother? Sometimes I've called the nursing station and asked for someone to help my father with the phone, especially when he was too weak to do it himself.
I hope that the sacrifices those with parents in care facilities make lead to safer resolutions for them in the short and long term.
With family, they don't have that kind of control - though it's not you but others they have to worry about I'm sure.