I need help, please. My dad is in the hospital and we had to put my mom in a nursing home since she can't be left alone. We just took her today and she has tried to leave multiple times and is very upset and frustrated. She cannot remember where she is and why she is there.
Good luck, you are dealing with an amazing amount of stress, emotion and fires to put out and you are doing all the right things. Keep the faith and strength that you are taking the very best care of both parents possible under the circumstances and remember to take moments for yourself too.
My mom just ended up in nursing home, too. She fell in January and went to hospital, rehab, back to hospital, back to rehab and finally it was clear that she could not be discharged home because she requires assistance with all activities of daily living (ADLs.) In her mind, she's still under treatment - as she was in the hospital, and we've not had an actual discussion to say, "this is where you live now." We've discussed it as that we are taking it a day at a time and, as of today, she's not able to go home because we don't have the home care available. This seems to work for now, and on some level I can tell she knows but she does re-ask the question every few days. It's hard.
She will adjust or she will not but in these situations there is not always a good answer, not always a way for "fix it". Sometimes the sad truth is simply the sad truth. This is not your "fault". You are grieving the situation as well. This is worth grieving.
Move away from trying to find an "answer" where there almost never IS one.