Thanks to all of you who gave advice about moving my mom to memory care and how to break the news. Long story short, with a mix of aid from her doctor, a long talk from me, a short visit a week in advance, a boost from a family friend and multiple white lies, I moved her in 2 days ago. The good news is she’s out of bed, dressed and clean, and eating. The bad news is she’s obviously disoriented and scared. I also wonder if she’ll regress as others seem less cognitively with it. It’s not as though I expected she would thank me for suddenly uprooting her from her home of 57 years. But she looks so fragile that I find myself wondering if there wasn’t some other way or alternative (even if my rational mind says there wasn’t). Will it get better?
I like Commutergirl's idea about the music. My LO really enjoys it, even if it's for a little while. Can you put a radio in her room. Will a staff member turn it on and off for her?
If after awhile she seems to be scared, I'd discuss it with her doctor to see if she's overly anxious. I'd explore medication to see if that would be helpful.