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This first started a couple years ago when I realized my mom was acting way different than my friends' moms. She talks like a four year old, even when she thinks people can't hear her, and she acts like it too. I honestly wouldn't mind, but she talks to my friends the same way too and it's embarrassing because people always point it out. Another thing that concerns me is she cannot control herself around food. She has multiple bags of candy hidden in her room that she eats on a daily basis. I usually wouldn't have made account here to post this but she also seems to have incredibly early onset of dementia or Alzheimer's. She asks me the same questions multiple times throughout the day and is incredibly forgetful, but she didn't used to be like this.

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Do not assume, only a doctor can diagnose and treat patients. Get a doctor to evaluate your mother's behavior as hers is not normal.
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unusedaccount: Perhaps the first order of the day is for your mother to be examined by her primary care physician. Then if warranted, her physician would send her to a specialist such as a neurologist.
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I do not see where you mention her physician involvement.
So, I would start there with making an appointment ASAP with her PCP and accompany her to the appt. You may want to inform the PCP ahead of time about these behaviors and observations. Has your mother had a " mini -mental" or other professional assessment for her cognitive status ? If not, I would ask for that if they do not volunteer to order it. If the PCP is already aware of this , then still pursue with them options for her care and your self care. This most likely will only decline and at what rate no one knows for sure. Be sure you have POA status in place for medical and legal decisions. Begin sooner rather than later to educate yourself about placement options and in home care so you will know your options going forward. There are significant safety issues already presenting in what you have written. It is not clear from your note if she has been formerly diagnosed with dementia and/ what type of dementia. There is always the possibility that she could have other neurological problems and, may need a referral from PCP to a neurologist for further assessment and diagnosis and treatment/care options.
Please do find some ways to take care of yourself !!! Caregiver burnout is a real diagnosis also and, comes on very quickly.....
Peace.
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She needs to be evaluated by a medical professional.
You will need to manage your own embarrassment. If you understand what is behind her behavior, you will be able to choose to feel compassion for her.

You do not mention your mother's age; where she lives (with you?), your age, medical condition besides 'seems to have...'

Gena Galenski
Touch Matters
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MACinCT Oct 2022
Gena if you are a professional and advertising, I am reporting you to admins because you do not have the label of this forum's expert opinion. You are also leaving your name which is personal information. Your profile has been around for a while but it is all about you
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What is her neurological diagnosis?

What has her Geriatric Psychiatrist recommended for treatment and placement?

What course of action has your personal therapist recommended for you?
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My mom is the same way

I am moving out AS SOON AS POSSIBLE because I can't take it anymore!
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TouchMatters Oct 2022
Yes. Perhaps a good decision for you. And, provide compassion, esp if your mother has changing brain chemistry, i.e., dementia.

If finances permit, it is best you do what is best for you.
Then, support your mom with some distance.

Gena Galenski
Touch Matters
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Definately take a visit to the Doctor. Mention the changes you have noticed, increased sweet food intake, increased questions, baby voice etc. Go first on your own.

Then take Mom in for a 'check up'.

Doctor will probably want to take reugar bloods, BP, cholesterol etc if no checkup for a while. Diabetes? check sugar levels. Rule things out.

Asking the same questions over & over could be memory, but also anxiety or other reasons. The Doctor can do mood & memory screenings tests.

Take note if she uses 'baby voice' with the Doctor. Or with others in the community eg shop staff? Or is it just with you & your friends? When she wants something done for her?

I have met women who play 'cute & helpless' for attention & to get things done for them.
Not saying this is her, but see when the 'baby voice' is used (if not all the time).
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When you visit the doctor have your own discussion with him without mom with you. Tell him your concerns. This is what I did. I DID NOT tell my Daddy that he had ALZ -- my choice. He knew something was wrong but I had medical POA and I knew that if he was told this he would just lose it. If you have not already, get POA, put your name on accounts, change the trust, talk to an elder attorney (best money I ever spent). I was not the only child but the others never argued with me about what I did. I kept them up to date and when I had control of everything they new I would distribute things evenly.
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TouchMatters Oct 2022
It doesn't do any good to tell a person w dementia that they have it. Instead, say "as we age, the brain changes' ... 'and we all need to make accommodations, be compassionate towards our self.' ... "It happens to all of us."

Encourage family member to talk, share how they feel.
Reflective listening - reflect back what you heard them say, do not make any judgments. Help them get out their sadness, confusion, frustration.

The difference is in the degree and diagnosis; there is no need to get into specifics.

Gena Galenski / Touch Matters
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She definitely has dementia. Take her to her doctor and then discuss care options with him.
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How old are you unused?
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unusedaccount, when your Mom visits her doctor, have the doctor run a test for an Urinary Tract Infection [UTI] as such an infection in someone who is older can mimic dementia, along with other out of the ordinary behaviors. It's worth checking out.
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They do become like a small child because the brain is literally dying. Take Mom to her PCP. Tell her its for her yearly Medicare exam. The doctor should order labs to rule out anything physical. If you are not her POA or on her HIPPA paperwork as someone the doctor can talk to, then write a short summary about what you have noticed. I kept my notes to one page in 14 Font. Numbering 1 to whatever and keeping it short.

1. Incredibly forgetful
2. Asks same questions over and over
3. Acts and talks like a 4 yr old
4. Hoards bags of candy in her room.

You hand the paper to the receptionist and ask if the Doctor can read it before the appt. This way he can ask her the appropriate questions. If he confirms Mom has a Dementia then ask for a referral to a Neurologist. A Neurologist can determine what type of Dementia Mom has. This is important because of medications she may need to use.
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funkygrandma59 Oct 2022
The OP says her mom "seems to have incredibly early onset of dementia or Alzheimer's" so highly unlikely that she would be old enough for Medicare and the required yearly physical.
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I always say this: Everything is fine until it isn't fine anymore.

Your mother didn't used to be like this, but now she is. She used to be fine but now she's not fine anymore.

See if you can get her to the doctor for a physical. I don't know how old you are? If you have access to her medical portal, write an email to her doctor and let him or her know how mom is acting and give a head's up before mom goes in to the office for the exam. That could be helpful for the doctor to know what's going on in advance of seeing her in person.

Best of luck.
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Maybe she needs to see a neurologist or her PCP. How old is mom?
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She needs to be seen by a doctor and evaluated. Address your concerns with a medical professional.
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You don't mention her age, but the symptoms are those seen with dementia. Send a letter to her doctor and ask for an evaluation for her.
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