My mother is in a ALF and on hospice. I also utilize a few hours of private care each day. But, for the 4th of July weekend, hospice is on holiday as well as the private care. I must rely on understaffed ALF. I used to love holidays. Now I dread every minute. They all say there is someone on call but something must happen before I make the call. An hallucination, a fall, or a messy undergarment are all possibilities. Every big holiday seems to be a setback for her. I pray that all will be well. How do you get through the holidays?
Even tho he has someone with him 24 7, the Caregivers don't really do much except what they have to like take him to poop or feed him.
No interaction, not much talking at all.
Just the TV blaring.
He has dementia but he enjoys having Company.
Rather it's a Holiday or not,, One day is the same as any other, just as boring as the next unless he gets a visit by a family member.
Visit as much as you can..
If you can't visit on a Holiday, make sure you call or send something which will make you feel better.
I've installed cameras at my Dad's so I can watch how he's cared for.
You can't make Caregivers be friendly but I can certainly watch any time 24 7 to make sure my Dad is being cared for and I know it's better than him being in a Care facility.
We just need to do the best we can, that's all we can do.
Prayers
The skin of the frail elderly is no different than a baby's skin. The diapers has to be changed quickly and frequently. Hospice will not do this.
I took care of my mom 100% of the time so she was comfortable and needs met. Mom died with perfect skin. I ended up having to get a feeding tube put in so she would not have to die of dehydration, which can take two week. Mom never bothered it and that feeding tube took a LOT of work to keep clean and well cared for. She died peacefully and never needed to be on narcotics or psychotropics.
But I also realize not everybody can do this.
Life sucks.
Private hire through an agency should work when when you need/want them. Yes it might cost more since the caregiver would be making "holiday pay" but someone is always willing to work a holiday just because of that.
Does this facility get paid by insurance? Do they have a medical team?
My best friend's spouse was in hospital over the last week, and there was care on July 4th and July 5th, which were both holidays. It was a bit sparse, and some nurses had to work 18 hour shifts (because some will call in "sick" on holidays and there needs to be coverage).
Something seems very fishy. If you are not local to your mother, she may need a local advocate. If you are local, either get involved or let it go. If the private care will not cover on holidays, find different private care.
A friend of mine found out her family was using one person for 7 day/week, 24 hour per day care of her dad. But she was not local, so there was nothing she could do. If you only have one option - the ALF hospice and the private care your mother is using - then you only have one option. But I'm not sure why any of the fears you have are pertinent - isn't hospice temporary so a "messy undergarment" isn't as bad for someone with 6 months left vs. years with worsening pressure sores?
The hospice organizations that we had for my brother and my mom, were never off duty.
If your mother's ALF is telling you that YOU have to change a soiled brief or pick her up from a fall, etc, they're way out of line and you need to take the matter up with the Executive Director immediately.
The holidays should be no different than any other day in managed care. If your mother is having a hallucination, a nurse or QMAP should come in to give her a dose of medication prescribed by hospice. In fact, she should be scheduled for regular dosing if hallucinations are an ongoing problem.
Let the ED know, in no uncertain terms, that you are not going to do any hands-on care for your mother in her fragile condition and expect the staff to do it! That's what you are paying for.
A couple of years ago, we had a hail storm here which soaked my mother's carpet in her apartment in the ALF. The ED told me to take her to a HOTEL for a couple of nights while they set up fans to dry the carpet out. I was flabbergasted. I said absolutely not, and to figure out another solution because there was no way on earth I was going to be changing Depends and dealing with vertigo etc in a HOTEL room with a 92 year old woman with dementia. So lo and behold, he put her up in a different apartment in the ALF and had the staff move her bed, recliner and tv set into the new place! 😁
Speak up! Otherwise these EDs will try to walk all over you!
Good luck!
I guess if you don’t wish to do it, so you can participate in holiday gatherings or simply relax, then hire someone to be there.