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This is my first post. My 85-year old mother is more confused and forgetful than she was even just a few years ago. More details later. For 60 years she has been kind, generous and patient with me and I grieve the loss of the woman she used to be. When I visit her - perhaps too frequently! - I tell her how glad I am to see her and I take pleasure in the simple things we can enjoy together - walks, Scrabble games, old photo albums. I appreciate the posts of others who are dealing with the deterioration of elderly parents. I am crying as I type. Thanks

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A PCP is not experienced enough in Dementias. You need to take Mom to a Neurologist. And, at this point, should not be alone. Dementia is very unpredictable, u never know what they will do,
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Wheat, Barb is correct. Your Mom needs a neuro-psyc consult ASAP. This will stage where things are at and help you both. As my brother told me after his diagnosis with "probable early Lewy's dementia" by his symptoms--"I sure am not glad to know I have this, and I sure am not glad to know where it is going" but I am glad we can make plans now to protect me, and glad that I can appoint you to take on my Trust and POA, and I am glad most of all to know just WHY I see the world so differently.

We got on with it ALL, and he was likely just the best person I ever heard discuss his symptoms, what brought them on, and etc. He was fascinating and he could have taught a course in it. Fact is that on some FB pages there are folks with Lewy's who ARE there to teach.

So time to find out what is going on here for sure. Be honest and open with your Mom about changes you are seeing because I can tell you she is already seeing them herself and trying to deny them (from my brother: "I KNEW something was wrong....", but that after an accident that totaled his truck and injured him badly, leading to his diagnosis.).

Best to you. And again, Welcome.
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The gold standard for a diagnosis of dementia is a neuropsych workup. Both my mother and husband had this testing done at teaching institutions.

The assessment involved imaging (brain MRI or CAT scan), testing of neurological functioning (basic memory, executive functioning and sequencing skills) and a neuropsychological assessment (IQ test with some additional features).

Did her doctor recommend any followup?
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Welcome to Forum. I am so sorry for what you are going through, but you are in the right place. Whether this Forum can help you at all to adapt to your changing world, and that of your Mom or not, you at least will feel less alone.
My best out to you.
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Thanks for your quick response. No official diagnosis of either dementia or Alzheimer’s but her doctor has noted cognitive impairment. Is there a test for either dementia or Alzheimer’s?
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How blessed you are to have a mother that is/was kind, generous and patient.
Treasure those memories, as those are the ones you will remember when she's no longer here.
It is a grieving process we all go through when someone we love is declining and no longer the person we knew them to be, so be kind to yourself and allow yourself that time to grieve. It's very normal.
And if visiting her is now getting too difficult for you, perhaps it's best for the time being anyway that you cut back on your visits.
Enjoy whatever good moments you can with your mother, and know that she still loves you very much.
God bless you.
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Wheat85 Dec 17, 2023
Thank you for your kind answer. I really appreciate it.!
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has your mom been diagnosed with dementia or ALZ?
Do you or someone else in your family take her to the doctors?
Has she been diagnosed with dementia or ALZ?
Has she had any health issues? Any falls, bumps, or stroke that may have caused this decline?
Possibly it’s just natural declining.. if this is the case, then maybe this will be the new baseline.
Talk with her doctor.
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