I'm so concerned that my mother isn't always getting the best care at the rehab facility she's at. The goal is to get her hip pain under control and through PT, back to being able to walk unassisted (with a wheeled walker) and return to her assisted living apartment. At what point do I just trust and let go of the worry? They weren't adequately addressing her pain relief right from the beginning (and thus, her ability to do the PT), but we had a big meeting yesterday morning and a care plan was put into place. So many things seem to fall through the cracks when the patient is alone, and in my mind, she's sitting there miserable and despondent, as she was evening before last. Do you simply get used to mistakes being made? I simply cannot be there all the time, nor is it in her best interests for me to do that. I myself am disabled, so the physical toll is exhausting, along with the mental toll. I even fell asleep for a spilt second on the way home, while sitting at the stoplight. If anything happens to her there, it will just have to be. I have done my best...so why do I feel so awful?
My parent is back in her Assisted Living apartment as of this morning, and she is quite tired but happy to be in her normal environment. The move would have occurred yesterday, but the facility had state surveyors in and were otherwise engaged. Anyway, for now she seems to be in a good place, and we are all relieved to be out of the Rehab area. She will continue to receive PT/OT, and we will monitor her pain level to make sure the pinched nerve continues to behave itself. It was a long haul for sure, and as I read the advice you all posted while I sat in the Walgreens parking lot, I felt like I had an online comraderie of others who knew what I was experiencing. My mom said, "don't get old" to me and my sibling...but as we all can't avoid growing old (nor would we want to), it seems little to ask that we do so with our dignity intact.
PS...thank you pstiegman for your concern & comments about the stoplight issue. I will keep those in mind. It's likely that two back to back nights of 3.5 hours sleep may have contributed to the incident, but when I next meet with my doc I may bring it up. I look forward to the holiday weekend when my dear spouse can be my chauffeur and resting on the way home is a treat!
When my brother was in the rehab facility, the medication did not work, so he had his delivered by Walgreen's.
Second of all, they were expecting him not to be sharp but believe me he is...
and he went in everyday to the pt. like clock work, they did not entertain his idea of morning and afternoon or everyday... but if it says rehab facility, one would think the rehab would be their primary goal, right? WRONG!
residents back to their old self, or at least as close as possible. At our facilities our gold is to get you so that you can go home again. Many facilities here in california are transferring to short term rehab only. After 21 days you are either ready to go home or you transfer to a long term facility. It is intense therapy only. Sorry for your bad experience.
My dad would call me late at night in distress over something small and in the beginning I'd spend the next hour, from my home late at night, trying to get a supervisor on the phone. Gradually I learned to not react like that especially late at night. I'd try to soothe my dad instead, telling him I'd take care of it in the morning. And usually by then he would have forgotten the whole incident. He had the luxury of forgetting. I didn't. As his condition progressed I had to learn to take a step back because being his advocate was a 24/7 job. I learned to focus on what issues I could resolve and just let the rest go. It was damned difficult but for my own sanity this was the only way I could go about it. Eventually hospice came on board and they were a Godsend, running interference between us and the NH. My dad got the attention he needed and the effect of that lasted most of the day. He was happy and we were happy.
But my suggestion to you is to let the little things go. In our case, I learned that 'care plans' and 'goals' didn't mean crap. The first few we went to we were thrilled to be able to be an active part of my dad's care but those plans and goals were required by the insurance company and had very little basis in his reality. It's paperwork that has to be completed and, in my opinion, totally useless.
Be an advocate but try not to react to everything or else you'll be running around in circles, driving yourself nuts.