Quality of food in assisted living facilities. What's the best way to check up on the food other than spending mealtime there?

I have heard so many negatives about assisted living— such as a parent not being attended to for a long time when they press the call button, to staff that sits around and texts ( they won’t show this on your tours of course), the food issue I heard about is that if a resident isn’t hungry at meal time they usually won’t try to follow up with them later and being a healthy snack or something to their room, they still fall in these places, they are a industry for profit, unless a person has no other options but to spend a lot of money for an al I would look at other options. Last week someone here said their dads assisted living demanded they pay a lot of extra money to have a private sitter for him bc he flirts w ladies there. All the money a person pays for an al is supposed to include superivision so this is a good example of how they rip people off. Another common tactic is to demand the senior is moved to the more expensive memory care unit when they don’t truly need it but bc they don’t have appropriate staff in place for supervision, it’s a good way to hike up the cost. I realize that was more than what your question was about but it’s really distressing how a lot of families pay big bucks for these places w an expectation of their loved one being cared for day and night not worrying if they haven’t eaten in days or had to call three times over an hour to have staff help them etc. Brochures I’ve seen often advertise gourmet cooking but this is part of their advertising- maybe some places here or there really do provide good quality tasty healthy meals but probably more don’t than do once the tour is over and loved ones aren’t around to see how it is

I've only been in a Rehab situation and not in AL, but although Rehab was in a combined AL/Nursing Home/Rehab facility, the food was the best part of my stay. I don't know how the food might have been for longer term residents, but it all came from the same kitchen, so I would hope it was as good for everyone.

Residents made selections from the menu a day ahead, and every other day the staff went shopping and would buy specially requested food items if the store carried them. The food was decently prepared and I got enormously spoiled being waited on.

Since the overall Rehab experience included a lot of negatives including neglectful, careless aides, rude, unpleasant nurses and poor and intermittent pain control, I try to remember to still give the facility kudos for the food!

Ask for a menu. When I visit my mom, the menu is posted in the elevator. I take a picture of it so I can see what meals are served for the week. When my mom first got there, she was 145 lbs. Now she is back up to 165. She has a lot more energy, looks healthier and stronger. Her AIC has been steady at 6.7 and doing great. She might not like some meals, but enjoys most. Usually the menu looks good to me! I’d love someone cooking for me😃

Where my mother was living, the food used to be reasonably good, but as new management took over, it seemed to go downhill. For example, they had fish sticks or similar preparation, and it was about 3/4 bread crumbs. There was a lot of salt and everything, to the point it was barely palatable. So much of it was fried--I suspect most of the fast food chains served better junk food. If I were living there, I would prefer to bring in canned food rather than eat what they usually served.

Maybe they thought hypertension was the goal instead of a detrimental condition!

I can only answer to what I know about the two facilities my mother has resided. The first facility had better food then her current. My mother is in a MC unit which is attached to an AL facility. The food is cooked in the AL kitchen and brought upstairs, kept in warmers and then served. It is not healthy or nutritious. When we interview her current facility they told us they had a nutritionist on staff and their were menu choices for the residents. I asked employees about the nutritious & no one heard of such a person. For the first few months Mom had two choices for her meals. This changed and we were not notified. Prior to the pandemic I would visit all times of day so that I could see what they served at breakfast, lunch, & dinner. Breakfast was the best out of the three meals. They also give them snacks, not healthy either, mostly store bought cookies, granola bars, small chocolate bars. Once in a great while if the activity person is doing smoothies or baking those that attend will get to taste. Her facility is still not opened, as if 5.25.21. She has lost 28 pounds in the last year. Our mother is not a large woman so this is not a good thing. We are currently looking for a new facility however, we believe we will not find one that actually does what they say they will. If you are concerned & cannot visit during meal times ask the facility for a copy of their menu. If you are unable to choose what she eats ask them to send you what she eats on a report. They are suppose to keep this information in her file. I wish you the best.

Why not ask for 2 lunches and have them brought to an outside area where you both can sit and “enjoy?” lunch. you could do the same for a dinner or breakfast.
Most facilities have the menu either posted or it is available on line.
I am sure complaining about the meal is much like it has always been with school, college, and many job cafeterias.
Keep in mind that this is “facility cooking” large scale meals that have to comply with a wide variety of diets, it is not going to be like “home cooked meal”.

My Husband was never one to turn down a meal, however when he was in rehab, a man that was pretty much non verbal looked at me when I asked why he was not eating and said,”this is terrible”.

My sister moved into IL in mid-December. At that time the food quality was decent, but delivered to a TV tray outside their rooms due to Covid, Sometimes my sister was asleep when the food came and didn't hear them knock on her door, so when she got the food it was cold. Now they have opened the dining room, and insist that all residents eat there. If you are ill and cannot come to the dining room, they will charge an additional $5 per meal to bring it to your room. But it still arrives cold, because it is delivered after they serve everyone in the dining room. Also, the portions have shrunk so much that one-half spring of broccoli is considered an appropriate vegetable portion. Residents are so disgusted that 8 have moved out in the last two months. They are also losing workers, so that all personnel, including the sales, cleaning, and management staff, including the van driver, are cooking and serving food, which they have no training to do. Unfortunately, we signed a one year contract to get a lower monthly payment, so moving is not an option for my sister. And this isn't a low-rent facility! We are paying $2K per month for room and board, plus another $900 per month for medication management. Anytime we complain, they remind us that this is an INDEPENDENT LIVING facility and my sister should be able to take care of herself. Totally disgusted!

Imho, it very well could be the fact that the food is not inedible, though not satisfying to the palate. My own late mother, though not in an AL but an NH, was served something that she had never consumed before - a taco with the side of lettuce, tomato, cheese and salsa. My brother exclaimed "This is cold" referring to the salsa. I said to him and my mother "Yes, it's supposed to be cold; it's salsa." I then gave my mother an example of how to eat it.

I certainly can't comment on food during the Covid situation.
When my mom was in a skilled nursing facility in 2017, family was welcome to eat as well. We were even given a meal the evening she passed. Honestly, the food was very GOOD. I agree with your suspicions regarding quality.
Now that my dad is residing in my home, I can see his appetite is diminishing. My cooking skills are pretty good, and I'm trying to make them elder friendly as possible.
There are lots of things going on... loss of sense of smell and other senses, meal times that are odd, food temps, feeding difficulties, and lack of really great cultural cooks in group settings.
Can you ask for / or view the weekly menu? Are you allowed to have food from home or restaurants delivered. Will Nutritionist/Charge Nurse/ Resident Advocate/ Social Service speak to you?
I am so sorry your sister is unhappy with what she is served.

"...she has been known for many years for exaggerating or telling "white lies"."

This along with dementia might result in a lot of complaining. It happens. Claiming "everyone" agrees could be part of her exaggerating. Same for the food being "awful."

The type of care facility available 15 years ago may not be comparable to facilities today. But, not all facilities are created equal. It's unfortunate you had to move her in 6 months ago, when you wouldn't be able to fully vet the place. My general recommendation to people is to use ALL your senses when checking out places: See, hear, smell, taste, touch. Don't rely on ratings or brochures. Go at different times of day. Chat with residents (non-dementia) or staff in the halls. Observe the MC area, if/when possible. However, at the time you moved her, that wouldn't have been possible due to the virus.

As more residents and staff are vaccinated, sooner or later, if not already, you should be able to join her for visits and meals. If you aren't allowed in the dining area, perhaps you can arrange to share a meal outside?

Many times I'd join mom for lunch, dinner, special meals and the BBQs they would have often. Except for special meals and BBQs, I didn't preplan joining her for the meal, so what I got was normal fare for everyone. Mom's place always had choices. Soups, Salads & dressing. Two different main courses and you could pick/choose the veggies. The meals were good. My mother gained 20# in her first year there, but that was a combination of sitting too much (her choice) AND those lovely chocolate covered ice cream bars!

You always have someone who balks at some or all of the food. They sometimes had those new blue potatoes, and my mother wouldn't eat them! Someone at 97 would prefer what they are used to, not this "new fangled" stuff! Often she would pick breading off anything, whether it be a sandwich or lightly breaded chicken. It was not bad food, she just didn't want it. I'd seen her do it at fast food places. Rice? Forget it! I love rice, no clue why she hated it.

I see a lot complaining about bland foods, no seasoning, etc. Mom's place wasn't like that. Normal salt used to prepare most meals isn't going to impact most - it's bad for those who don't even taste the food put in front of them without dousing it in salt first! Personally, there are very few things I even like salted - just what's needed to prepare it. We ALL need some salt, just not a coating of it! For sure, there's likely excess sodium in many pre-packaged foods (sugar too!!!!), so it is better to avoid those and stick with REAL food prepared before a meal. See this, esp the last 5 paragraphs:

https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/6-dangers-of-sodium-restriction#TOC_TITLE_HDR_8

The best solution to determine if your sister's complaints are real is to find ways to join her for meals without prior warning. Needing an extra meal or two shouldn't be a big deal. For the special days, so many might join that they generally would need/want a head count. Go at lunch here and there. Go for dinner sometimes. I do know they served the primary meal at noon on Sundays, so the evening meal was sandwiches - you might have to check with them about that. I never did breakfast, but mom generally ate cereal in her own place - most likely she continued with that and OJ. They did have eggs. pancakes, waffles, bagels, etc for those who wanted them. There was even a day when she had breakfast, and then forgot and demanded breakfast! They gave it to her.

If you can randomly show up and have a meal with her, you can see for yourself. I wouldn't listen to what too many residents say and if staff doesn't eat the food, how would they know? I'd even brought my own meal and joined them. Random days and meal times a few times/week for a few weeks should tell you all you need to know. If you find the food decent and good tasting, she's either just complaining because she can or she just doesn't like what's offered.

My brother is in a nursing home paid by Medicaid in California and this is definitely a real problem. Since my brother has been known to exaggerate I made friends with some of the other patients and asked them about the food. They said it was horrible. When I reported this to the Department of Licensing for Nursing Homes, they said they talked to patients and no one complained. I don't believe a word of what they said. I have seen some of the meals before Covid and they are not good. All the while, the Administrator and top staff drive Mercedes, Range Rovers, etc. Something is definitely wrong.

Your sister may have had a habit of "exaggerating", but when it comes to institutional food, a lot of people in institutional settings (school, camp, military etc), will claim that "everyone" agrees the food is "awful". And it only takes a few to qualify as "everyone". It may not be really terrible, but it's never as good as at home or in a restaurant of ones choice.
Take a look at the the menus. What specific items does she dislike? Are there choices? Is there variety in the choices? Try to get your sister to be specific...is the food bland? (Often low salt is standard in health care facilities). If so, could she add seasonings of her own? Or are there seasonings she does not like. Are gravies or sauces used and does she like these? Are the meals hot when served? Sometimes by the time meals actually get to the recipient they are cold or nearly so. If that's the case, can they be heated? Are there items she likes that could be kept on hand and added to the meals prepared.
Short of actually sharing a few meals with her, you may not be able to tell. It could be that the food is actually sub par, but it could also be she is just tired of food that is mediocre or lacking the special touches that she likes.
A friend of mine, whose husband was confined to a "Covid locked down" nursing home, wanted to do something special for his birthday. He had been craving a certain fast food hamburger with fries. She was not allowed to bring it to him, (I'm not sure it was really on his diet) but the nursing supervisor (after some convincing) agreed to order for him and have it delivered. She was on hand when masked restaurant employees brought it to the door of the facility and handed it in. Everyone sang happy birthday and the patient was actually in tears, he was so grateful for his "birthday dinner".

Food preferences are subjective. A good assisted living provides options. Can you look at a couple of menus? Up until the last few years, institutional cooking incorporated a lot of shipped in food that was reheated. Similar to what we were served in elementary school in the 60s/70s. Lots of cream based sauces. We experienced that in one of the good nursing homes where he went through rehab. They simply did not have a kitchen preparation facility. Another rehab facility / nursing home served simple foods that children like (pudding, jello, grilled cheese, etc.) which my father with dementia liked. The memory care he lived in shared meal facilities with assisted living and those residents wanted more balanced and nutritious meals with more options, like a restaurant. It's very important that all residents get nutritious, balanced and good tasting meals.

My dad was in an assisted living and then moved to a separate different memory care. He has said he doesn't like the food in either. I have sat with him and can tell you that many times it smells just plain mouthwatering and he still says he doesn't like it. Yes, at times it's a matter of his personal preferences and dislikes, but I think he's just lost his appetite for food and uses "doesn't taste good" as his excuse.

We sat with my MIL a few times through her lunch in her memory care center, and I'd have loved a plate. The "salads" were wimpy, but those pork chops and mashed potatoes looked a whole lot better than the chips and hummus, or peanut butter, or leftovers that I was going home to! And the desserts!
Mom continued to lose weight because she was a poor eater, but most of the residents looked well-nourished and enjoyed the meals and snacks there.
Maybe you can drop in at meal time, and if the food looks good, ask if you can have a plate, which they'll add it to the monthly bill.

To all who decide to "bash" people for speaking the truth about circumstances and their situations, instead of telling them to leave or move or do this or that, CONSIDER THE FACT THAT THERE JUST MAY BE REASONS THAT DO NOT MAKE THAT POSSIBLE. I am not going to dignify this bashing by giving examples of why some "obvious" moves are not possible - but believe me, there are often very legitimate, valid reasons for someone NOT being able to leave and go elsewhere or live differently. But until you find out those reasons, you will continue to put that person down and that is just unkind, rude, and downright mean. Wait until this all happens to you - then you will see what I mean.

I live in assisted living - two places now. I assure you the food is INSTITUTIONAL........first of all, all places work on a budget amount for whatever the topic is and they don't budge. Their job is to provide AT THE LOWEST COST....JUST A FACT OF BEING IN BUSINESS. Second of all, they have people who look only at the food and calories and nutritional value and by law there are certain minimum mandates they must adhere to (not what you and I would like or recommend). Third, no matter what you are told, almost no kitchen prepares the food from scratch - like if you bring it home from the store. Everything brought into these facilities comes from mass producers who package and do whatever with the food before it reaches its destination - all prepared, packaged and frozen before it is sent out. It will never, ever resemble out of the store to the plate food - nothing tastes as good, it is often so bland, sometimes horrible. Then you have state laws which demand you cook it to a certain temperature which means it is dried out and overcooked. You get it, you are hungry, you force yourself to eat it if you can and maybe are sick afterwards. If you are lucky you may find a few good meals among all of them. I will be 88 and can't walk (which is why I am in assisted living) but I am 100% high functioning, still work two jobs (51 years and still loving it and also 15 years as a Power of Attorney). I thank god daily I kept my car and can safely drive so I can go out to eat and go to the store. I have no stove but I have learned many tricks to prepare nice meals using a microwave and other methods so I can prepare my own food. The food is most places is horrible - don't ever NOT BELIEVE THAT - it is true!

The Assisted Living facility my friend is at serves nothing but prepackaged junk food. Nothing even remotely healthy. These places charge exorbitant fees yet buy the cheapest, unhealthiest food available. Mostly breads and pastas and cheap, sugar loaded cereals usually marketed to children. The only vegetables they serve are canned. Sometimes the owner would splurge and buy frozen, but for the most part, it's the very type of food that got the residents sick in the first place. I took pictures of the stocked kitchen and sent them to the Ombudsman.

The sweets are overstocked. Lots of brownies, cakes, pudding, soda, kid's cereal, and candy. All highly inflammatory foods. Every disease is caused by chronic inflammation in the body.
My friend has a crock pot, a microwave, and a Nutribullet in his room. He used them often until he started declining & stopped having a desire for food.

I had good food at the NH I was in except for head chef’s vacation week. My uncle’s nursing home food is good. I have eaten there many times. I had fresh vegetables and fruit every day.