Does it seem to anyone else that Forum is seeing more "Drive-by postings" from folks who seem to have crossed the line from "You can't make this stuff up" to "This has GOT to be made up."
I mean, young women entangled with multimillionaires who are forcing money on them, while the family heads in with a posse? People with an elder in the trailer out back who have questions as to whether their death by roasting temperatures would constitute charge again them?
I am sure it's me. Too much time spent here to try to even out the walking and reading and gardening and going starkers with shut in. I know just which of you will send a message telling me to take a vacation; but that's just the problem. I can't!
I do believe that back in the day college students were notorious for continually trying to get fake letters published in Dear Abby (or was it Ann Landers?). Covid has given some people a lot more time on their hands, and perhaps trolling is more fun than baking, knitting, reading a classic novel, etc.
Didn't mean to hijack your post Alva. I just had to address the cold monkey.
I think that this is a bit seasonal, posting usually slows in the summer and the weirdos come out of the woodwork. I have been here since 2017 and I have noticed this every year.
Love you all.
Gee I guess I am a bit naïve, never considered some posters making up things because they are bored. I hear you Alva.
Others that irk me are those who refuse to do any basic research when suggested. We're not here to hand out advice to people who won't at least do some leg work themselves.
I too thought CWillie's monkey was shivering, but beyond that, perhaps actually frozen, or extensively cyanotic. Or maybe it's a new hybrid strain of a monkey. Watch out - it may be harboring a dangerous virus!
I think also that referring new or repeat posters to existing threads would shift some of the burden from the regular posters. Some of us have gone through the same issues over and over, and there are many threads attesting to advice already given. Anyone who can locate a forum online can learn to use the magnifying glass on the tool bar and search for answers.
What perhaps really bothers me are the cold and callous attitudes toward parents, and sometimes family members. It's clear that there's a lot of friction in some families; but we're not mental health professionals and can't solve two siblings fighting against each other. I think these posts are primarily to get sympathy, not suggestions.
There are also occasional comments on parents that disturb me, comments of treating them like they're tenants, or not parents but burdens. I know that not everyone has had the benefit of good, kind, caring parents, but I wonder if that's the case when I read about some who treats their parents as tenants, or as burdens. These are the ones that prompt me to feel that it's time for a vacation from the forum, which is what I feel now.
On the issue of fake posters (or "socking"), I think this has been enabled by the Internet for decades, back to the late 1990s. One of the forums I used to frequent was a legal one; I gained a lot of insight into how the big law firms operated, how attorneys in these silk stockinged and white shoe firms coped with the pressure.
I also eventually recognized that one with whom I was P'M'ing was actually a male, pretending to be a female to see how differently he might be treated, and what personal information he could gain. That was unsettling. It was my first real experience with a "sock puppet."
The Internet has enabled so much for so many, good and bad, and "socking" is one of the worse practices.
Alva, thanks for creating this thread and allowing us to share our concerns.
And GA, I fully agree with you about the callousness some post toward their relatives. It’s completely understand that some caregiving becomes overwhelming, the situations people are in are too much to handle, and burnout is real. But the vitriol is awful. I try to as kindly as possible steer these people toward finding other placement before the toxicity becomes abusive for both parties.
Just so grateful that it is not only me thinking these same thoughts!
After my loved one has passed recently, (not my husband), I did think I was losing it. And apologies to my friends who tried to support me through negativity with a sibling. Sibling also needed support and I was burnt out.
Maybe taking a week will help. See you next Sunday?
CWillie's monkey, "Speak no evil" is blue because it is holding it's breath trying not to speak. Either that, or gasping, then holding it's breath after reading some of the things written on the threads. lol.
Daughterof1930:
What a great suggestion: A FAQ's section. Then all we need to do is refer new posters to the FAQ's!!!
Paid for caregiving elder? FAQ's.
Bladder infection? FAQ's.
Living with a millionare? See section on trolls.
I admit, isolation at home since early March has taken it's toll on me.
Ahhh, "cwillie's" monkey avatar - I thought it was a monkey "sweating" because we live in an extremely hot climate and that's what we all do here -- sweat! "cwillie" please send some of your cooler weather our way - we need it.
Margaret - I know sometimes when I post on the "what's for dinner" thread it may sound either expensive or complicated but, it's not. So like the rotisserie chicken are the ones you buy already cooked and just reheat, the pork tenderloin is already seasoned and I just put in the oven for 45 minutes, the top sirloin or New York Strips are all bought at Walmart. My husband enjoys having a nice meal sprinkled in with my fast, last minute meals. The muffins, biscuits, shortcakes and chocolate cakes are for diabetics (I'm pre-diabetic and ten pounds overweight since during the pandemic and my mom nearly dying in April we were getting takeout all the time) and is two small servings. They take ten minutes or less to make from start to finish. Even the wine I get at Walmart is the $2.50 bottles. Also, I don't have a regular job so I am able to get up early and get things prepped before I take care of things for my mom or go do a "window visit." On the days that have been extremely busy and stressful with my mom are the nights my husband goes and gets takeout. I post on the "what's for dinner" discussion thread to sometimes get away from the real "heavy" stuff just like I do with the "joke" thread, "count your blessings" thread and the "my favorite things" thread. It's for when I'm in a funk and want a creative outlet. So it may be that it sounds more expensive and complicated than it really is.
I guess I missed the "millionaire" post!
No doubt my monkey would be more recognizable if you could see her sisters on either side.
Hard to imagine other posters are not familiar with the old old adage of
Hear No Evil, Speak No Evil, See No Evil.
It was interesting reading about your reason behind your avatar choice too. :)
I cannot bear to see what's going to happen with the monkeys!
(See No Evil).
At the time I considered a monkey with a mask but I figured that would be too controversial 😉
Masks are controversial!
Maybe we should have just put our hands in front of our mouth!
(Speak No Evil).
"What a great suggestion: A FAQ's section. Then all we need to do is refer new posters to the FAQ's!!!
Paid for caregiving elder? FAQ's.
Bladder infection? FAQ's.
Living with a millionare? See section on trolls."
WOW! My first big laugh out loud in days.
"I admit, isolation at home since early March has taken it's toll on me."
But, at least it hasn't taken a "troll" on you!
I'm glad you think I'm "too funny" - LOL when you looked back at yourself and you came up with your mother's pureed food!!!
Ordinarily, I wouldn't "explain" my cooking/eating/grocery spending habits but, "trolling" on the "what's for dinner?" discussion thread - really??? It's not like I'm making "gourmet" meals...so just wanted to set the record straight.
Still, wondering what you meant by your statement: I just do not "get it". It sounded so much like a former poster would have said to me. So much like "NeedHelpWithMom"! You remind me of her:
NobodyGetsIt
5 hours ago
"Sendhelp," -
"I admit, isolation at home since early March has taken it's toll on me."
But, at least it hasn't taken a "troll" on you!
Oh, I'm sorry about that - I was just making a "play on words" to your last sentence in your comment addressed to "AlvaDeer." The subject of this discussion/thread was about trolls and when I saw your statement: "I admit, isolation at home since early March has taken it's toll on me," I said "...at least it hasn't taken a "troll" on you. I wasn't making fun of you - I've just always liked play on words humor. No harm meant by it.
Hope that clears it up! (I think I'm getting all confused now) :)