I put this out there in hopes that this will not happen to another family.
My aunt became a co-signer on her 92 year old father's bank account. She has essentially taken everything he has ($250,000), ran up credit cards (also a co-signer), let his lights, water and trash service be disconnected. His property taxes went unpaid for two years and were due to be auctioned off - all without his knowledge because she had the mail re-routed so that he would not know. We met with the police and essentially, because she is a co-signer, they say that there is nothing anyone can do. It is her money by way of being a co-owner.
Understand what making someone a joint signer means. The POA is bad enough...but the joint signer is what made it legal. She's figure out the perfect crime and is walking away scott free. He on the other hand is probably going to have to file bankruptcy and will lose his house as he can't afford the credit card payoff.
Sad state of affairs when the law protects the criminals. :(
Regularly , if able, get hair strands off elder or their hairbrush. Later if you suspect foul play....drugs show up in hair.
I care about this primarily from the legal ramifications. If you are not a beneficary, they consider that legally you are as a stranger and have no standing in ANY matters pertaining to the elder. That is why the first thing greedy caretakers, and I use that term loosely, push to change. POA is medical or legal. Most sibs take the medical POA. as also legal in fiscal metters. You can bet the smart rip off the relatives and elders parties learn real quick to co erce the elder to change the will and names on accounts. This gives them unchecked liberty to abuse the elder and ANY other caring family members, but eliminating their standing. Hospices encourage this as it makes their death koolaids easier to dispense with when only dealing with 1 family member. Sick, sad and morally and ethically wrong, but if made legal this way, by threats or taking advantage of elders dependency and fear...legal all around. Elder abused, stolen from, and quickly dear. Perfect crime. It is Americas silent scandal that NO one is doing anything about, including APS. Family is helplessly made to endur with tied hands. So wrong.
My mother lives in government housing, takes herself to the doctor. Brother has half the land ( mother and Dads ) for sale, has kept it locked up, (was open to any family as long as Dad was alive and never locked but was the day after Dad died) and brother got himself a new trailer and a new wife and is living on the land, while mom is left to rot in Government housing 30 miles away. She is 81.
He takes moms car and leaves her a shift truck without out power steering, that she cant drive. ( ( I gave this car to Dad before he died and brother took it before dad died because brothers car was reprocessed. )
It is awful. Sis and I had to know all our parents stuff was stolen or sold by brother, we were offered NOTHING minimally sentimental even, and lied about to moms relatives upstate. .
He was controlling dads remains, for goodness sake.
It all smacks of the perfect crime, with plenty of evidence, BUT no one will or can do anything. I just went through a divorce that co incided with Dads termenal diagonoises, and have no money to fight any of this. Both Sis and I did consult seperate attornies, only to be told if our mother is ok with this and we are not in the will, nothing will be done.
Unreal. He has abused parents and profits. I cannot even talk to my mother for over a year now, because he has her " under his spell". There is more but I will tell you, it seems a no brainer that walking away is the only option us targeted siblings have.
APS was called - as were the police in the county that he lived in. Essentially, once he agreed to putting her on his bank accounts, he essentially was saying that his money was her money. We went as far as the state attorney general in Florida, Pam Biondi, but was told that yes, it was a shame and yes, it was wrong, but legally his only option was to file a civil suit. That would be fine if she still had the money, but she spent it all. Eventually we ended up moving him away from there to here and he's had to start all over at 93.
Our dealings with APS was that because he was not mentally incompacitated and she was not physically or mentally abusing him currently, they did not get involved.
You may have some room to do something with the signing the land over after your mother was mentally ill -not sure.
Sad state of affairs - these people are vulnerable to coersion in my opinion and seemingly the law is on the side of the abusers :(