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Wondering if anyone else is dealing with this… our LO makes the most rude comments and talks nonstop. I read somewhere that can be a dementia thing. Regardless, it is incredibly taxing to be around and drives my husband and I batty. It’s hard to converse with someone who is hellbent on insulting everything (you picked the wrong shoes, you’re not stylish, you don’t do a good job cleaning/cooking, your hair looks terrible, you don’t take care of me). We basically respond with “mmmm, ok.” Finding it very difficult to want to continue taking care of this loved one when when this is essentially the level of conversation we’re having. Anyone else have experience handling this?

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If you look up disinhibition you will see that yes, it is a dementia thing for sure, but it often happens without dementia as well. There is so much loss in aging. Aches and pains, hearing and sight, balance and continence, ability to walk and talk and care for the check book. I could go on. And it doesn't make for a happier disposition

You well may be at or near the end of the rope with in home care. You will hopefully know when that time comes because people can become so overwhelmed with it all that they lose their mental and physical health. One has to know ones own limitations.

So sorry you are going through this. Social "nicety" isn't the strong suit for seniors, for certain.
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I’m assuming you are talking about your MIL . The same woman that has you cleaning poop off the floor .
You and your hubby need your life/ marriage back .
Since her incontinence is not under control , and she seems to need frequent attention in general, she’s either needing memory care or SNF. Not AL.
I would bet money she has advanced dementia .
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Catlover99 Mar 2023
She does. It’s noted in her medical history that she does. Some days are better than others. But the general trend is downwards in everything.
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I think the, “mmmm, okay” answer is probably the best answer for this situation.

There’s no point in aggravating yourself or her further.

As soon as you can, walk away from her chattering and take a break. Make a cup of tea, turn on some music, do whatever you feel that will help you to zone out for a bit.

All caregivers become overly stressed at times and this is when anything can add to their anxiety.
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