Follow
Share

My parents and I are moving to a new city where we'll be closer to family. Everyone is on board with the decision and my parents - both with moderate dementia -- have some understanding of what's happening and even express their support. (And then they forget that we're moving.) I have been their primary caregiver for years now. I am blessed with family members who are also involved in caregiving, albeit from a distance. Even so, I am aware that "transfer trauma" is possible. I know that everyone is different but I'm wondering whether anyone has experience in these kinds of transitions. I have the opportunity for a 10-day trip but am locked into dates that I can't change. As it stands, this trip would happen just two weeks after the big move. The move is 300 miles away and into a home we've never actually toured. (Covid issues). Would my absence increase the possibility of trauma?

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
How close are other family members to the new location? Will they stay in the new home with mom while you are away? They certainly cannot be left alone. Some never adjust to a move like this. At least they will have you which has been a stable factor in their lives.

You certainly need and more than deserve the time away. I hope other family will step up to stay with mom while you get a break. Nothing like when the boots hit the ground to find out how this will work in the long run.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Time it takes to settle in -- months, if ever.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I don't know. Every situation is vastly different so you're just going to have to go with the flow.

Set up lots of care and backups if possible and go on that trip and enjoy the heck out of it!
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Unfortunately everyone is different. Some (few) adjust quickly, some take time (certainly more than the 2 weeks before your trip), others never really adjust. As it progresses, "home" becomes some place lived in the past - your current home, their home(s) when you were growing up, even a childhood home.

It is good that you have family who are helpful. Unless the layout of the new place is the same, the best you can do is try to make this new place as similar to the old one as possible. Certainly someone should be staying with them while you are gone. Indeed there can be that moving "trauma", but again, every person is different. They may not even blink.

If possible, while you are away make calls during down times on this trip, preferably video calls, so they can see you and be assured you are okay and will be home "soon". This too shall pass, so take the trip and enjoy/relish every minute!
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter