My 75-year-old mother is having TIA’s (mini strokes) and falling to the point she is giving herself traumatic brain injuries. She is facially disfigured from oral cancer, and appears to have early dementia. She owns her home and financially does not qualify for Medicaid. I’m a nurse and can deal with all the medical issues, but would have to quit my job to do so? Are there any Medicare services to pay for family caregivers at home?
Have you contacted County of Aging in your area? They can help guide you in the right direction.
Is she going to receive hospice care?
Have you considered placing her in a facility?
Don't quit your job; we see people end jobless and homeless in that way. Moreover, this will get worse, and you really will limit your own life in attempting 24/7 care.
I think as an RN (I am one myself) you will understand you may be looking at in facility care at this point.
She will qualify for Medicaid when she doesn't have funds. Her home will be exempt.
I would start with seeing an elder law attorney. A check up as to whether or not all paperwork is in order for you to function for your Mom, and what your options are. If you are already the POA your mom's funds pay for this.
Wherever you are working, discuss all this with a social worker. They are almost the best resource guides.
Why does she not qualify for Medicaid? Her house is an exempt asset. Is her monthly income too much? If so, see if your State allows for Miller Trust or Medicaid Qualifying income trust. This is where her extra money goes into the Medicaid Trust and when she passes it reverts to Medicaid. You should consult with an Elder Lawyer.
No, don't quit your job. You Social Security Earnings will be effected. SS only goes back 35 yrs when you apply. So at 67 they only go back to age 32. If in those 35 yrs you don't work 10 yrs, SS will only be based on 25 yrs of earnings.
As others have already said, do not quit your job. As much as you want to help your mom, she will need to use her assets to provide her care until she passes or does qualify for Medicaid.
She will need you to help guide her in making the best decisions for her health care. Hopefully she is still able to assign a durable power of attorney for health and finances. This will be very valuable in getting her the services she needs.
I assume your mom no longer drives? Medicare Part B has a benefit for intermittent nursing care for the home bound. This is not a 24/7 caregiver by any means but it will help you manage your moms care to a degree. A nurse visits weekly to do vitals, set up her pill box and do routine assessment. If mom needs blood work, that can be done at home by the nurse, if she needs a uti test or wound care, etc. All of these things you would have to take time from your own life to do.
If mom qualifies for the nurse care, then they can help bring a therapist in to assess mom for physical and occupational therapy and can assist with encouraging mom to use a cane or walker if that is deemed helpful. Also a home health aide can come to help mom with bathing, shampoo, changing her bed linens. If she doesn’t feel she needs anyone to bath her yet, they can help her with her safety while bathing. This service was all my mom needed for years but each persons needs must be evaluated.
My DH aunt had HHC and then slowly as her dementia increased we added private aides as needed until she needed more care than she could get at home.
Now this is with original Medicare Part B. Your mom may have had HH after her surgery or other hospitalization. That is covered under Part A. This is ongoing though it does need recertification on a routine basis.
If your mom doesn’t have Original Medicare, , look on her insurance card and call to see what services they offer. I am telling you my experience with original Medicare. They also provide hospice services.
Please understand, and as a nurse, I’m sure you do, that mom can fall regardless of where she is and regardless of who is with her. The best you can do as far as care goes in that regard is have her where she can get the help she needs when a fall does occur. There are medialert pendants, cameras, etc to keep an eye on her but it is a fine line between enough in-home care and facility care. At a certain point the inhome care will be more expensive than facility care.
As you already know Medicaid doesn’t come into play until your mom’s assets are depleted. In other words, she pays for her own care as long as she can before the gov helps. Most states only provide Medicaid for LTC in a NH or SNF.
It is a two part qualification process. She must be financially at need and physically at need.
You giving up your income to keep her from spending hers doesn’t work. There is help for her, benefits, that she has worked for.
You are still building yours.
Many of us find it difficult to stay focused when it’s a family member we feel compelled to help. When there is an emergency, yes, we rush to help, but when everyday brings an emergency we have to acknowledge that mom won’t recover to the degree she needs to live aline. Her care needs will increase so it’s time to make a long term plan that you help manage for her.
If you leave your job, you lose your benefits, if you have a life outside of work and mom, you lose that and you will need to be very careful not to pretend you don’t need self care, medical care, rest and relaxation.
And the biggest surprise for me was as my elders aged, so was I aging. who knew! 😳🤨😱
When mom eventually passes you will need recovery time.
So a long winded message to say don’t quit your job. Make sure mom has a POA. Visit an elder care attorney and take any benefit available even though it might not seem like enough, you can build on it.