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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
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How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
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Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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To start, you need to get a Power of Attorney. Do it now, before the dementia gets really bad. Get a handle on all the bank accounts, insurance documents, medicare, supplemental insurance, etc. etc. etc. There are so many scenarios out there based on the circumstances, but the POA is a must to work toward getting everything in order. Nobody will talk with you about their affairs without it.
also get POA Healthcare for those needs and draw up a care agreement if they are still capable w/the dementia which requires a trip to an eldercare lawyer if available.
JMart, how old are you? Are you setup for your own retirement? Like Ambriel said make sure all of their legal documents are in order. Learn about dementia by looking online. Google Teepa Snow. She has many youtube videos. At 89 I would not call this early onset, that happens to people much earlier in their lives, before 65 is the measure used, I think. Definitely 89 is late onset.
Think very seriously about whether you want to do this, more important is if you are able to. Do you have your own financial business straightened out? Do you have the sort of personality that allows you to be patient in the most difficult of situations? Dementia is a progressive disease. It may seem like an easy task now, but it will become more and more difficult. If you see them living in a facility in the future you should consider moving them now. It is much easier to move before the dementia progresses to where they cannot make sense of anything. Often times a move will cause a sudden drastic decline that they may or may not recover from.
Think very seriously whether you are able to do this. Forty percent of caregiver pass away before the one they are caring for partly due to the stress.
Likely you mean the early stages of Alzheimer's, JMart6963 . By 85 about half of elders are in cognitive decline. . As was mentioned by others, if you don't have all of the legal papers in order then this needs to be done before they are unable to sign them. You need a Durable Power Of Attorney for health care (health directive) and one for finances. Hopefully they have also made out a will.
Considering their ages and the fact that they are both showing signs of dementia, I'd start looking at care homes that offer different levels of care so that as they become more disabled by their AD they can move to a memory center.
With two of them in this shape, I can't imagine that you can handle this on your own. Moving frequently can accelerate dementia, so try to make a decision that will last the rest of their lives if possible.
Please check back with us when you can. We'd like to know how you are doing. Carol
There is a list of the 4 legal forms you need to have in place, check out the article on senior home search net, under 4 forms every adult should have. You can do most of the work at your home computer and then see a notery to finalize the forms. It is important as was stated to do this now before dementia gets any worse. You should also draw up a contract with them if they are going to be paying you for care. Just google care contract and you will find many examples to follow, again you do not need an attorney. No having stated that if your parents have a lot of money then yes see an attorney to structure things correctly. If they dont have a lot of funds you can take care of these forms with just a notery. Carol's suggestions about looking into care homes for the future is great advice. At their age things can change on a dime so you need to be prepared for every possible outcome. Start a file, keep reciepts and records in good order. If dad was a vet, you can apply for benefits once they actually need care. Read read read this forum is a great place to get info.
The forth form every adult should have is a living will. This is sometimes included in a DPOA form however many times it is not. It use to be called a DNR however the new forms are much broader in scope, allowing a person to make known their end of life wishes. With dementia on the rise it is so important that Every adult over 18 have these forms in place. They can always be changed as people move in and out of ones life but no one of of us can tell when we may need them. If you PM me I will share a link that explains them all in detail. If i post the link here they will remove it. I feel so strongly about the importance of these documents that I am preparing a series of talks for senior centers to help people become informed.
One thing to think about as we prepare our own documentation. What would you want to do for your own children is only one of them stepped up too provide care for you? I would want to pay that child the going rate for caring for me at home. I will spell it out in my POA when I get it done. That is of course if the funds are there which is very questionable at this point. And I would not want any of my kids giving up their lives to care for me, my mom would not have wanted that either. I really felt stuck between a rock and a hard place. I am happy I care for her and L for those four years, and it just sort of happened that way. I think now, that twisteds hoped I was financially exploiting my mom and L and their call to APS was a way to get me to leave or maybe even have me jailed. Then I would be out of the way. But, leaving would have been the worst thing I could do; talk about looking guilty!
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Think very seriously about whether you want to do this, more important is if you are able to. Do you have your own financial business straightened out? Do you have the sort of personality that allows you to be patient in the most difficult of situations? Dementia is a progressive disease. It may seem like an easy task now, but it will become more and more difficult. If you see them living in a facility in the future you should consider moving them now. It is much easier to move before the dementia progresses to where they cannot make sense of anything. Often times a move will cause a sudden drastic decline that they may or may not recover from.
Think very seriously whether you are able to do this. Forty percent of caregiver pass away before the one they are caring for partly due to the stress.
Considering their ages and the fact that they are both showing signs of dementia, I'd start looking at care homes that offer different levels of care so that as they become more disabled by their AD they can move to a memory center.
With two of them in this shape, I can't imagine that you can handle this on your own. Moving frequently can accelerate dementia, so try to make a decision that will last the rest of their lives if possible.
Please check back with us when you can. We'd like to know how you are doing.
Carol