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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Yes it happened to me in a fairly minor way. I was the daughter living some distance away but in the same city as mother in an IL facility, doing all the visiting, emergency hospital admissions, excursions blah blah blah. Mum has an accident, both sisters come because it’s serious. I talked to them about mother changing her IL unit to one close to my house, for easier visiting, grandchildren visits on the way home from school etc. Older sister gets angry, says that’s just for my convenience, mother is happy where she is. I sat in the airport with younger sister, weeping about both of them going away, 1000 miles on a plane, and leaving it all to me. No sympathy or understanding at all of what they were leaving behind. I got over it, this is years ago. But I now understand even more that neither of them had any experience or understanding of care issues, and it’s almost impossible to explain to someone who has their own different opinion.
Oh yes. My brother, who never attends any of mom's doctor appts or talks to her social worker, is constantly arguing with me about mom's care. I am following the are plan set up by her PCP years ago and we update it everytime we go in. He doesn't care to actually get the facts. I have now decided to direct his arguments to the social worker or a geriatric care manager. Just not putting up with it anymore.
Family dynamics can be so tough. All sorts of things involved. Guilt enters the picture I am certain. Grief. It is always easier to be angry than to feel our own inadequacies and pain.
Many of us here. My twisted sissies reported me to APS for financial exploitation. Of course, nothing of the sort was going on. Their goal was for me to stop caring for mom and they probably hoped that there was indeed a crime. I cared for mom 24/7 for four years. Anything they could do to make it more difficult for me, they did all while continuing their lives without any responsibility for mom.
Gosh, I understand your situation, I have a brother that is condescending, arrogant and determined that he knows what is best. Just yesterday he was calling the hospital behind my back to find out what I was doing...very embarrassing since only one person is supposed to be calling...
You know what you do, tell them if they can do a better job, they are welcome to it. Its easy to criticize when ur not doing the caring.
My SIL heard nothing but criticism from her sister when it came to Mom whom my SIL was doing everything for and they lived in the same area. Sister took Mom to the lawyer and had the POA reassigned to her. SIL handed everything to her sister and said "now you handle it". SIL's mother got in debt because of scams and over spending. SIL made sure her bills were paid. A couple of months after the change of POA, the IL where Mom was living called to tell SIL Moms rent had not been paid. This was POAs responsibility. SIL was able to get POA reassigned to her and sister never tried again. When Moms house was sold, sister wanted to know what her share would be. SIL told her nothing, its Moms money that goes for her care.
Same problem with my BIL when my husband and I were caring for their mom. He was happy to tell us what needed to be done to care for her and how to do it. When my husband asked his brother how he was going to help, BIL replied, "She lives with you, she's your responsibility." My husband was so mad that he kicked his brother out of our house.
Not surprisingly, they have very little contact now that MIL has passed.
One of my favorite expressions to those who tried to tell us how to care for her is, "She who sweeps the floor, picks the broom."
Good luck to you. Know that when your caregiving is over, you will have peace that your sibling will not.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
My SIL heard nothing but criticism from her sister when it came to Mom whom my SIL was doing everything for and they lived in the same area. Sister took Mom to the lawyer and had the POA reassigned to her. SIL handed everything to her sister and said "now you handle it". SIL's mother got in debt because of scams and over spending. SIL made sure her bills were paid. A couple of months after the change of POA, the IL where Mom was living called to tell SIL Moms rent had not been paid. This was POAs responsibility. SIL was able to get POA reassigned to her and sister never tried again. When Moms house was sold, sister wanted to know what her share would be. SIL told her nothing, its Moms money that goes for her care.
I was lucky, my brothers let me do the caring.
Not surprisingly, they have very little contact now that MIL has passed.
One of my favorite expressions to those who tried to tell us how to care for her is, "She who sweeps the floor, picks the broom."
Good luck to you. Know that when your caregiving is over, you will have peace that your sibling will not.