My grandma is 83 and suffers from dementia and Parkinson's disease. She has had her dog Ellie for over 16 years, in human years! So as you would guess, she is very attached to this dog. However, the dog is very old and is no longer able to hold her urine due to old age and I'm guessing some health problems. Every day I am cleaning up urine after the dog and my grandmother. Ellie also has trouble walking and just doesn't look happy anymore. She sleeps all day and frequently falls on her butt while walking and then cries because she can't get up. Long story short, my father and I feel it may be time to let Ellie go to heaven. We have felt this way for the last six months to a year or more but have put it off due to my grandmother and her strong friendship. Ellie sleeps in her room every night and sits by her chair during the day. My question is, what do we do? If we decide to let Ellie go to heaven, how do we explain it to my grandmother? or do we even say anything? It's not like my grandmother wouldnt notice her absence. But I feel like she deserves to know or be involved in making the decision but then again I really don't know what to do and I want to do what's best for her. Please help! Thank you for all of you that are able to respond. I appreciate it
Speaking of that, reminds me of a sheep we had. She was 12 years old. All her teeth were loose and she was having problems getting up and down. She had been my daughter's FFA project. Said daughter had left home and had no room for the sheep, so she stayed with me. I loved her immensely, anyway, I took her to the vet for a shot. I just couldn't shoot her in case she didn't die quick. One butcher would slit her throat, and we could feed her to the dogs. Couldn't do that either. So, I took her to the Vet. As he shaved her neck and administered the dose, I fed her chocolate chip cookies. You can't do much better than to go to sleep eating chocolate chip cookies.
I had to do this twice and I am not sure if you will have the same results I did, but...
My 92 year old mom lived with me for 2 years. When she moved in, she brought her 20 year old Siamese cat and 13 year old German shepherd. Mom loved her pets. The dog developed a tumor and it was time. Due to the Alzheimer's sometimes the dog was mine and sometimes it was hers. I put the dog down when she was away at daycare and I told her when she got home. Of course, she remembered the dog was hers that day and she mourned and missed her but she did accept it. The dog was obviously struggling.
About a year later the cat, needed to go down. She was urinating all over my house. Every time I tried to talk to her about it, she would get very angry with me, she was going to go home and bury her cat in her own back yard, etc. etc. (In my mom's mind, she was just visiting me). By this time, her dementia was worse. I took the cat to vet while she was at daycare, got rid of all the cat stuff, told her the cat died, and when she got home and she just said "oh ok" and that was it. Out-of-sight out-of-mind.
What I would do - first have the conversation and see how she reacts. If she accepts it go ahead and do it. Secondly, there are vets that will come to the house and euthanize a pet at home. It is more expensive and I did think of doing this, but decided it wouldn't be a good idea. And lastly, she may not remember. I do not know how bad her dementia is, but I was shocked when I put the cat down and it was literally out-of-sight out-of-mind.
You have to think of the dog too, if she is suffering, please let her go.
If she needs a companion animal there are plenty at your local animal shelters. If she asks where her dog or cat is, tell her they passed away peacefully, there is no need to tell her they were put down.
I know this sound hardhearted but they would not allow animals in rest homes or assisted living unless they are service animals.
I hated putting down my beloved Golden but she was suffering from cancer. Do what needs doing.
When I had to have my cats euthanized (at nearly 20 years of age), my vet sent me a touching emotional condolence card. Although I don't remember the specific wording, it was something to the effect that they provided love, comfort and companionship to me for years. Now it was my turn to acknowledge that, treat them with respect, and prevent them from any further suffering.
If you don't feel comfortable getting another pet, perhaps you can get a large toy dog that looks very real and keep it near your grandmother.
The "falling", sometimes it's that tile and wood floors are slick, keeping nails short and tossing down a few rugs at key places has given a few of ours more years when we were afraid they were in trouble.
I think if it were me, I'd have her owner in on all the decisions, at least as much as possible. Like tell her "OK, I collected some urine to be dropped at the Vet's". Then when they call, "OK, test results said..." That way she'll know an expert is in on it, and that you did all you could, even if it is only in the back of her mind, and on some days. The loss will be hard enough, you don't want it compounded with the awful thought that all considerations were not given by her, and you.
16 is pushing it, but my GMA had a collie mix live to 18, you never know. You say she doesn't look like she feels good, and that may mean it is her time, (underlying organ failure, etc.). Or could simply be not feeling well from the Urinary Tract Infection. Investigate, keep GMA posted, often times the dog "let's you know" when it is their time by these clues, looking unhappy and sick is usually one of the clues.
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