What can I do about family members who consistently ask him for huge amounts of money knowing he will say yes! Dad doesn’t know how much money is in his account as my sister takes care of that and when it runs low she cashes out his stock. But then gives money to others and herself. As a side note her and myself are co-administrators for her estate. Any help would be appreciated!
If you have a Family or Elder Care Attorney you could contact them as well.
Your sister probably should not be an administrator of the estate.
You could also file to become his Guardian. This would mean a lot of paperwork for you but it would protect him from your sister and anyone else
but I worry If she ever needs care there won’t be any money left and unsure if Medicare would look back at her account and see over $100,000 missing in the past year
The issue of your sister's method of addressing replenishment of funds:
"Dad doesn’t know how much money is in his account as my sister takes care of that and when it runs low she cashes out his stock. But then gives money to others and herself."
and "her and myself are co-administrators for her estate." Was this a typo to mean that you and your sister will be co-executrixes of your father's estate. I'm not trying to be critical if that's just a typo, but it's important to establish the relationship of each of you to each other and your father, in legal and economic terms.
Do you know how his stocks are titled? Same question for any bank accounts through which stock distributions are channeled for subsequent distribution to relatives.
Perhaps I missed something, but it's unclear to me what authority is allowing your sister to cash out your father's stock. Is she co-owner of the stock? Is she acting pursuant to authority in a DPOA? Or under what specific authority is she selling the stock?
Co-administration is irrelevant if you were referring to your father's potential estate because the estate isn't created until death. If there's a trust involved, though, and if any of the stocks are titled in the trust, there's a greater problem with distribution, i.e., the taxation of the distributions at trust levels.
When she does cash out stocks and distribute the funds, how does she report it? Is she filing his tax returns? Is she providing notice acceptable to the IRS of these distributions? Are the recipients including them in their own tax returns?
She could encounter significant difficulty with the IRS if she's not handling the distribution and taxation (if any) of the stock sales. This needs to be addressed, and it's equally as important as her abuse of funds.
You also addressed relatives on Medicaid who aren't working. If they're including the distributions in their tax returns, that could affect their Medicaid status. If they're not including the distributions, well, you can guess how the IRS would view withholding of income, although I don't have Medicaid experience and don't know how Medicaid would treat gifting if it's below the established level.
I think you might need a forensic accountant to address the financial issues.
I think there's more to worry about than someone not in the federal government not seeing that $100K is missing from his accounts. As others have stated, there are illegal actions taking place, and they need to be addressed immediately.
You should contact the authorities and APS to protect your mom. Because you are right, if she needs assistance and has no money, Medicaid will view all of this as gifting and she won't get the care she needs until the penalty period is over. Not only will they see this last years theft/gifting but, the will see what has taken place for 5 years.
She could be ineligible for help for years because of this and someone would need to step in and provide her care themselves.