I am considering this for my parents to try to get ahead of it the best I can and let a professional take the reins. I was a financial person in my former life and saw the value of fee for services when you don't have the time or inclination. The person is a "CMC, LNHA, Gerontologist"
I'm afraid of making a mistake. It's $180 per hour. She is local so would know of all the local options, rather than me calling all these different places and glazing over from sales pitches. Even calling the lifeline folks today it felt like she was angry that I said let me make sure my parents are OK with this set up.
Anyway, if anyone has successfully or unsuccessfully used one, pros/cons, learnings, I would love to hear about it. Thanks.
I know that some people use them when there is no family nearby where the elderly LO is. In that scenario where the geriatric care manager is doing virtually all the hands on work, it could cost way more/ many more hours.
I would never pay someone $180 an hour for that. Your local council on aging is a great resource and it’s free.
Who will be paying for the GCM? Hopefully it will be your parent's expense. Are you their PoA? If not, I'd be very careful about plunging money into care solutions when you don't have complete legal representation for them. And, unless you are literally a multi-millionaire, you won't be able to sustain paying on their behalf without depleting your own coffers for your own care.
I get that it is very time-consuming to provide the management. I'm a business partner with my husband, and much of what I do aside from my actual professional work revolves around bookkeeping for the business. It's boring and I dislike it. Now we're PoAs for 3 of our elders. More management. Even though we're now semi-retired and have a more flexible schedule, their care needs keep ramping up. One of them is in FL and we're in MN so I travel down there at least once a year to make sure everything is copacetic and matches my management efforts the rest of the year.
Maybe think about what you absolutely don't want to do and outsource that. But again, only if your parents are willing to pay for it, can pay for it, or you have robust resources.
In the end, the GCM will still need your input and participation on certain things no matter what. If you are PoA and it is active for one or both of your parents, it may make more sense to attempt to transition them into a good IL/AL community where they also have MC and LTC and accepts Medicaid.
Will your parents accept working with this "stranger"? Please continue to look through this forum: there is much to know and you seem to be at the beginning of this journey. There is a lot of great advice and wisdom to be found here. I wish I had found this forum back in 2016 when both my inlaws were broke, sick and falling apart.
Great service and in some states they must be licensed by the state, have background checks and insurance.
Thought we had a place lined up for my Dad. After doing the care evaluation, my dad can't afford that. So waiting to hear from another home.
It has been a godsend for me, because I never wanted to be in the position to handle my dad's medical needs. He has also appreciated it as well because he is more comfortable talking with her about his medical needs than he is with me.
It's expensive, but as someone already mentioned he has the money for it, so we are very lucky. I strongly recommend it, but agree that you should be very clear what their scope is.
The county aging services in our area are pretty much income-based, and we don't qualify at this time although we could down the line if we live much longer!
https://www.aarp.org/caregiving/basics/info-2020/geriatric-care-manager.html
For the one I hired, the contract says that essentially I can terminate the relationship at any time, and only pay for the hours actually used. So that kept it "minimal risk" at first when evaluating how helpful the GCM was (as I posted below, she has been helpful)
This particular GCM has no minimum amount of hours and bills in 6 minute increments (so I'd better learn to keep it concise!)
She’s expensive, and in the beginning I took in a lodger to pay for her until I could get finances sorted to pay her out of mom’s bank acct. I utilize her services fairly sparely as a result of cost, but she has seriously saved my bacon a few times. In particular when I got covid and mom had an emergency, another time I was sick and mom had another emergency. This GCM lives closer to mom than I am.
I found her by calling the memory care place another relative was living in, then the GCM and I met in person to see if it was a match.
Absolutely best decision for me - having a backup ‘sibling’ with geriatric experience is huuuuuuuge.
I think it depends on what skills you need and if the person is licensed (by who) and what their background / education is.
Who was angry ? the $180 hour person?
Perhaps you can try it out for whatever feels right to you.
She likely has a minimum hour requirement, if not more than that.
She'll likely have a contract so read it carefully.
Write down what you need and see how it fits with her abilities / skills / services offered.
I was my friend's fiduciary, managed all his finances over the last two years of his life. I presume that this Geriatric Care Mgr won't be managing finances.
I coordinated medical appts., attended, wrote assessments to family outside of the immediate area. I really functioned like a social worker, offering a huge variety of services. I did not offer showers. I hired contractors and caregivers / supervised.
If you are overwhelmed and don't have the time to interview 'a lot of people,' ask for references and check them.
It can't hurt to ask for a fee reduction and see what she says.
It depends on how much work she needs/wants.
And a lot (to me) depends on how interactive she will be with you - keeping you in the loop of care ... which was critically important to me to do with family members. As I say "I work with the family unit.' I've also studied dementia (almost two years on-line with Teepa Snow).
Ask what geriatric / dementia experience this person has.
Supervising?
Coordinating?
Gena / Touch Matters
Thanks so much for your valuable input. It was the lifeline rep who seemed annoyed that I didn't complete the transaction. I actually still need to do that for them.
I had a very productive consultation with the team. They really seemed to understand the situation and will do as much or as little as I need. Some people have them do everything. Some just use them as a sounding board. The nurse who would be the case manager managed a memory care unit for 17 years and has a masters as well as Certified Dementia Practitioner credential.
There is no minimum amount of hours and the contract can be terminated at anytime. My parents are on board which is the most important part. I (all of us, we can guess but we don't know what exactly or when only that "it" will!) have no idea what is going to get thrown at me with this situation. To be able to call someone and based on them knowing my family and dynamics to get an action plan going based on their trusted partnerships instead of being in crisis mode is worth it's weight in gold to me. I already feel less anxious and I think mom does as well.
Moms biggest question is "if something happens to dad what's going to happen to me" ? And honestly it's my biggest question too. He's been having blood in his urine so now we have a whole series of tests going on for that. She was a wreck last night. If mom can build a trusting relationship with these folks "early" on she'll be more likely to take recommendations.
I haven't signed yet but have asked some follow up questions. What is the caseload, and do their partners pay any fees to be on their "platform". I want to know upfront if any conflicts of interest exist. They have their own care agency but I am not obligated to use them and they have relationships with others as well.
I have tried our local elder services. They are good but I feel more confident that there will be quicker action and most importantly help with implementing going private. I feel like it's the first time I've made a decision not in the middle of whatever emergency has come up.
Thank you and everyone who has chimed in here. 🙏🥺