My husband is a Vietnam vet with vascular dementia. We have never used VA doctors or hospitals. My husband is at home but I’m not sure how much longer that will be possible. I’ve been told the average cost for memory care facilities in our area is $7000 a month. Our income is too high for Medicaid but I’m wondering if there is a less expensive option through the VA.
I won't lie - it is a myriad of twists and turns and you have to be diligent about it, you have to have the right information in hand, you have to stay on top of it. But if you do - the VA seems to actually have a number of excellent resources available - you just have to know what to ask for - they won't just open the firehose and say "here you go".
My FIL had so many benefits AT home that allowed him to stay home for at least 10 years longer than he probably would have otherwise. And when we did finally have to move him to a SNF - there was a bed available in a VA home about an hour away - where his service disability afforded him fully covered room/board until his death last year. Private pay was SIGNIFICANTLY discounted until his full disability benefits came through. He was incredibly blessed.
You may not get everything you need or want - but it is certainly worth the time and effort to look into it.
Another resource is to have your husband evaluated for hospice. I know that no one likes to hear that word but I learned that home care from hospice doesn't mean the person is going to die in a matter of days. In your husband's case (and my dad's situation) the progressive disease won't improve. Hospice would set up services for 6 months. This service can be renewed another 6 months, etc.
Hospice will provide a team of a nurse/doctor, chaplain and social worker. There are additional services like music therapy, hygiene support (cutting finger nails and providing a shower/shave) One of the goals of hospice is to try to provide as many medical services at home even a swallow study with an x-ray. There goal is to keep the patient from spending all of one's remaining days in the hospital. I appreciated that! Hospice is paid through Medicare. There are NO COSTS for these services!
My dad did not qualify for VA nursing home. My understanding is that the disabilities to qualify had to come from service not old age.
It's a tough road! My caregiving phase lasted 2 years. Try to take some time for yourself. I wish you well on your journey.
A person doesn't have to have a diagnosis of dying to qualify for Hospice. My friend got Hospice.
IMPORTANT: Family needs to understand Hospice policy / intention of giving and how they give meditations - for comfort care and not to keep a person alive. They may not even treat sprains, falls, broken bones unless it is considered "comfort care."
PS: if you cannot find his discharge papers go to the VA website, they make it fairly easy to obtain a replacement.
If there is a VA medical facility or clinic near you, go talk with them. The Department of Veterans Affairs phone number is 800/827-1000. If there isn’t a VA near you, you can request a Field Service Officer for assistance. You could start with the Disabled American Veterans (DAV) at 877/426-2838 (www.DAV.org) or the America Legion at 800/433-3318 (Customer Service) or www.legion.org.
We got started on this journey with a Field Service Officer at the Armory in our hometown. He was SO helpful and knowledgeable.
It does take time and effort but it is worth it. Don’t give up. Gather whatever military records he may have including his DD214. It’ll be helpful as you talk to people.
Best of luck!
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