I have POA for my estranged father who is living in memory care.
I arranged for his care and pay his bills. I have communicated to family members that he can't waste money and there is no need for him to have direct access to money.
When he manages to get funds he does something to throw a wrench in my budgeting.
Family members want him to have access to his stock accounts and "let him trade his stocks because that is what he enjoys". She thinks he won't be around that long to worry about money.
I have had no indication from caregivers that he will pass eminently. Although, he has lost weight recently.
Side issue, his last asset is land in MT that is owned by 4 people in total. If family won't sell how can my father qualify for Medicaid?
Close off all accounts to his access NOW, and give him a small spending account. My brother and I did this for him when he had Lewy's Dementia. He took good care of his small account, and in fact he grew it by selling some few last treasures. Other things need to be in your safekeeping for MANY reasons, not just the other people messing around. You and YOU ALONE need to be accountable now for every penny in and every penny out of Dad's accounts. You need a file for each entity and it needs to be your name on all checks.
Let the family and other meddlers know this BY LETTER and by LAWYER LETTER if need be.
Then it's done, it's all yours, and all financial meddling problems are over with.
I used to send my brother a monthly accountings of his assets Listing each: for instance Sterling Money Market 3,300; Chase checking accounting blah blah blah. He kept this in a binder he sometimes would take out and study.
Remember, this is your fiduciary duty now. Others cannot be doing this. This will cause a huge mess.
Best to you and wishing you good luck. Once this is handled it will be all taken care of. If Dad is well and able go to his bank with him to make his own spending account with you or anyone else POD. They will be helpful and he may enjoy doing that to say hi to old friends at the bank; my brother certainly did.
My father is able to call his stock account and tell them what to do so how does one stop that if I don't have guardianship. I have told the trading company that there are concerns and he is in assisted living with memory care. So far it is not enough to shut off his access.
POA isn't something you keep in your back pocket until someone asks for it. You're supposed to file it with your LO's banks and other financial institutions.
18 hours ago
Thank you.
My father is able to call his stock account and tell them what to do so how does one stop that if I don't have guardianship. I have told the trading company that there are concerns and he is in assisted living with memory care. So far it is not enough to shut off his access.
The only way this stops is through incompasitation… is he at that stage ? I was fortunate, the health services Nurse practitioner was very proactive and did this right away when my mom moved in to memory care.
But, somehow while my my was in AL in another state from me that NP gave her a DX of senility of the brain… no one talked to me about it and I was shocked to find it in her care plan. And I would not have thought this of my mom… but she had started having hallucinations.
Why do family members have access to HIS brokerage accounts?
WHO gives a man in Memory Care access to buying and trading stocks??????????
There's way too many questions here for anyone to answer you in a reasonable fashion.
You'd be best off suggesting to these 'helpful family members' that THEY take over the care and management of your father so you can let go of the entire matter. Since you are estranged to begin with, that's the logical solution. You can be a visitor instead, w/o any heartburn to deal with.
As far as land in MT goes, you would need to sit down with a Certified Elder Care attorney to hash all that out. Which may not be a bad idea anyway. The old adage 'too many cooks spoil the broth' comes to mind here, b/c there are too many family members trying to manage your father's life right now. That can't happen if his money is to last long enough to finance his care for the rest of his life. Only ONE person can have control here, and since it's not you, who shall it be?
Good luck
When it became clear that my mom didn't have the physical ability to pay her bills, I started doing it for her. But I wasn't doing it as her POA. I was paying her bills under her supervision and direction. I wasn't acting FOR her, as I would as her POA, I was acting WITH her. She wasn't mentally incapacitated to the point that the POA was in effect.
Is that the situation you are in with your dad? Because if the POA is in effect, no financial transactions should be being made by anyone - including dad - other than you.
If dad isn't incapacitated to the point of your needing to take over as POA, he is legally within his rights to trade his stocks, spend his money, etc. And, if in doing so, he runs out of money, that is on HIM to figure out, if he is mentally competent.
If you need an answer to your last question, then I agree with Lea to see an elder attorney. Just keep in mind, the more you get involved in this, the less you will be "estranged" from your dad.
Have you signed anything with your dad's residence that puts you "on the hook" to pay for dad should he run out of money?