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My mom (age 84) will only take her meds for me, sometimes. This is in the morning—at night she never takes them. They are clearly marked in a pill organizer. She refuses to take them from any caregivers and I don’t live with her. Does anyone have advice on this? She does not understand or respond to reasoning about staying healthy.

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Have you asked her why she will not take her nighttime pills?

What are they. If Cholesterol, depending on her age, I may drop that one. Its been proven it effects cognitively. You may want to go over her meds with her doctor. It may not make all that much difference if she takes them or not. Maybe she can take them all in the morning. In the elderly, medications stay in the body longer so may need to have lower doses too.
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NeedHelpWithMom Jul 2023
Also body aches too. My brother can’t take it. They found another med which is incredibly expensive but he doesn’t have a choice at this point.
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Absolutely agree with Daughterof1930 -- seems as if your mother shouldn't be living alone anymore. (And this doesn't mean she should move in with you.)
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Time to discuss with the MDs how caregivers give medications your Mom apparently needs when the elder refuses them.

May be time for palliative care choices or Hospice choices. Eventually some seniors even refuse to eat. You are down then to some pretty dreadful choices.

Discuss this with the MD as to what might be safely eliminated, what is a matter of life/death, and what the options are.
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southernwave Jun 2023
I second the idea of palliative care doctor. My friend is a hospice and palliative care doc and she nearly always starts withdrawing meds because she is ONE doctor who sees all of the prescribed meds.

In many cases each doctor is prescribing their own meds and there is no one person to evaluate all of the meds and their interactions and side effects.

She immediately sees the patient feel better in plenty of cases. The patient usually doesn’t mind withdrawing meds. But the family can get nervous about the idea.

Plus, they know a lot of information since this is their speciality. It’s just a really good idea.
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Does mom have a sound mind? Sure doesn’t sound like it. If she’s lost reasoning skills, it’s not safe for her to be living on her own. Consider if this is a bigger issue than missed meds. I’m sorry you’re experiencing this
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Her brain is broken. Of course she can’t reason or understand! She never will.

She clearly shouldn’t be living alone for this and other reasons. Even in a facility, she can refuse to take her meds, though. She can spit them out or hide them in her cheek, as my friend did. Sometimes meds can be hidden in food. Sometimes not.

There’s not a lot of encouraging stuff to say about this, and I’m sorry you’re going through it.
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Are there any medications that can be discontinued without endangering her life?
for example is she were diagnosed with dementia and has been on medications to slow the progress those could probably be discontinued. If she is on a daily vitamin, that could be discontinued.
If there are medications that she HAS to take and refuses ask the doctor to prescribe them either as a liquid that can be added to a drink or food. Or many medications come as patches that are applied to the shoulder or back. (this way they are not easily removed)
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I have experienced my husband refusing to take medication. He has dementia, therefore, no reasoning. Cushing his medication very finely and mixing it into his foods and drinks has helped tremendously and keeps him more stable and restful. We do not discuss medication time anymore and he is less frustrated.
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Can you ask the doctor if any of the medications can be prescribed as a patch that can be applied to the skin.
Many medications are available like this.
The patch can be applied to the center of the back so that she can not reach it to pull it off.
(If mom has been diagnosed with dementia, and you do not mention that in your profile, medications are not something that I would chose to "argue" about.)
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AliOJ58 Jul 2023
Check with provider about what is essential and what level of adherence is needed - for each med.
for some 70% may be fine and other require nearly 100% (ie memory pills with sun up sun down regime that requires diligence or can cause agitation and sleeplessness.
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possibly get a pill crusher (Amazon) and put it in applesauce, or in a protein shake. As someone else wrote... her brain is broken and reasoning will not help. Some times you just have to stand over them until patient takes the pills.
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Grandma1954 Jul 2023
Any pill or tablet that is "coated" should not be crushed.
Capsules, most of them should not be crushed.
Time release medications should not be crushed.
Any medication you should check with the pharmacy if it can be crushed or cut. (usually if it has a "cut line" it can be cut or crushed)
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What is her cognitive assessment? Does she have cognitive impairment such as some form of dementia? If so this may affect her compliance or non compliance, behaviors etc.
Speak with her PCP re med issues and they may offer direction options.
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