My grandma has dementia and is bed bound and she requires around the clock care. She lives with me, my mom, and my sister in her house. She was cognizant until about two months ago, and she appointed my mom to be her general POA. My mom has health issues and can’t do a lot of the lifting and hands on work required to take care of my grandma, and instead of hiring a caregiving agency, she decided to hire me instead.
While my grandma was still cognizant, she agreed to hiring me as a caregiver and we agreed on a pay that was fair, but less than what an agency would charge, and we got this in writing. I occasionally also give my mom some of my pay because I just want to. She doesn’t ask me for it, but I like to give her something since neither of us have been able to work since this all started. My mom also buys things that I need occasionally with my grandma’s money because she feels bad that she can’t help me take care of my grandma and I had to miss a semester of school because of it. It’s nothing extravagant, it’s things like a $50 printer for school and stuff like bedsheets and (cheap) shoes from walmart. These are all things that my grandma would normally buy for me even when she was her old self.
Is this legal? Our POA document does have a section that allows the POA to give gifts. I just don’t want my mom to get in trouble for breaking her fiduciary duty to my grandma because of me. My grandma used to live alone and had given my aunt an authorized user card on her bank account which my aunt abused and spent more money than my grandma knew about, which put a flag for elder abuse on her bank account. She lost a lot of money, and that’s when we came in to help her fix what my aunt had messed up. We made a grocery purchase soon after, and an employee at her bank who is a family friend called us questioning what the purchase was for and threatening to call corporate security on us. After that, my grandma got a POA in place to make sure it didn’t happen again, but my mom and I are terrified to spend money on her account now, which is why I’m so nervous about the idea of my mom hiring my to be my grandma’s caregiver and buying me things on my grandma’s account. My grandma’s dementia is also at the point where she is extremely paranoid, and if you told her I stole money from her account she’d might believe you. It doesn’t help that our spending on her account has increased lately because her care needs have drastically increased since she’s no longer cognizant. The whole thing just scares me a lot.
But then, the POA is in charge of finances if grandmom can no longer make informed decisions. So if the POA cannot do the caring, they would need to hire someone from grandmoms money.
I do think you need a lawyer and one well versed in Medicaid. You need to make sure how ever you handle this, Medicaid will except it.
Your Mom as POA is having to do many documents, filings and records. A printer for her to get is a legitimate expense she can keep track of. She needs to keep METICUOUS records of every penny of Grandma's assets, their earnings, when more assets come in (SS check and etc) and of Grandma's expenses. If you are an expense that need to be legally set out in stone.
See a Lawyer. This is one thing, in the management of Grandma's assets that I can tell you IS a legitimate expense.
You do not want to play fast and loose with the law. It can not only come back to bite you, but it can come to bite you all, even Grandma, who may need access to medicaid at some point, hence good records for them to access.
SEE A LAWYER NOW.