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How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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This is becoming a major financial burden for my husband and I. The first 4 1/2 years they were able to be home alone and I was able to work? I have to be with them 24/7 is there any means of financial help? Southern Calif.
Medicare can help out in some ways so that they can stay with you. Also check with social services for the elderly in your area. There are day care centers where they will be taken care of while you work.
Do your folks contribute to household expenses? If not, why?
Are you now staying home with them 24/7? That is an almost impossible job for you. Taking care of one person is difficult enough much less two. And if finances are tight in-home care is probably not an option.
Depending upon their health they may need a nursing home. I'd suggest an assisted living facility but they are way too expensive. A NH will accept Medicare and Medicaid. Have you given any thought to placing your folks in a nursing home? I know it's not what you want to do but how much longer can you keep supporting them? Don't ruin your finances, your credit, or your life caring for your parents.
Nicolady asked a question regarding any knowledge of financial help to care for her parents in her home. I think to tell her "it's time to move them to a nursing home." is not what she was looking for. Surely the nursing home idea has been thought about, talked about, and mulled over during the five years the parents have been with her. Perhaps that solution has been rejected, for one reason or another. Many people keep telling me emphatically to put my mother in a "place!" They tell me I can't keep doing what I'm doing. I realize it's coming from a good place in their hearts, and that they're only trying to relieve me of hardship and exhaustion, but really....it's not THEIR mother. It's MY mother. And I don't feel the time is right to place her in the care of someone other than myself. Maybe down the road I will see clearly that the time has come, but I have to see that very clearly, otherwise it won't be right. Nicolady, as Greenie suggested, Medicare may help with some in-home care people, to give you a hand, which you must desperately need. Also, as Eyerishlass said, they should be able to contribute with expenses with their social security, and possibly any property that could be sold, for help with this financial burden. I admire what you and your husband are doing in caring for your parents in your home, and send you best wishes and hopes that you can find some help to relieve you of such an overwhelming burden.
I have never tried this but I keep hearing about people who get a person to live with them, that person will watch and entertain the people during the day while you work, then that live in person will have free time when you get home. The live in person is paid a small amount but they are given a place to live and food for free. Some people around me have done this having a live in come from another country to experience living abroad and learning english and working as a caregiver. It would have to be the right fit though, you would need space for them, they would have to be able to deal with old people patiently. I think you might need to sponsor the person but there are agencies that can do this. My friend sponsored a girl from bolivia who went to school at night and did care in the day and the bonus was that she was bright and sunny and happy and so interesting and really wanted to learn about the US.
Adult day care is a wonderful thing. My mil goes two days a week and it does give me two days for me to do things with out worrying about her. Her dr would like her there five days a week because she needs more social interaction to help with her anxiety issues but she wont go due to fear. If they don't contribute financially they should start paying their own way. If the don't have the funds then you should have them apply for welfare, food stamps etc. Any social services that are offered should be put in place
Thinking that I might need some home nursing care for my mom, at some point, I did check to see that Medicare covers home nursing care. Also, if your parents have supplemental, check that, too, as I found that my mother's supplemental says that it covers home nursing care.
However, I did not go far with this, yet, as I don't need it, yet. So I don't know how much Medicare and her supplemental actually covers. Also, I was planning to see what the hour limit would be, as I would not assume 24/7 home nursing care without checking it.
I would think that caring for one or both parents, would have a negative affect on your health. What is the plan for your parents, if you are no longer there?
And to answer your question, both of their Soc. Sec. should be going to you. I think that you have been generous enough.
Also check with their doctor. Sometimes the md can write a prescription for health aids who could help with bathing, bathroom cleanup, feeding, dressing, etc. That would give you time away from home. My parents contributed to the household expenses, and to my loss of work provided health care. Without that, I'd be unable to stay home to care for now, just Dad.
You don't say how old they both are, and if anyone is a veteran. So I am going to assume they get social security, and that should be spent on expenses in the household and for taking care of them. If one is a veteran and receiving military benefits, he/she is receiving military pay. Both are eligible to reside in a state Veterans' home with a DD214 as proof military service was served honorably. Hang in there! You have done a magnificent job so far and check with CA area on aging about what else is available.
yes... i take care of my mom...she is bedridden from dementia/alz... feeding tube incontinent etc. i am her care provider.... call ihss in home supportive serivces and they will help you... you can get up to 200 hours per month at minimum wage....i live in central california
Trust me when I say this, put them in living assisted or nursing home before you start to resent your parents. I have been looking after my mother for 15 years and I am now resenting her. I think I have finally comes to terms with my quilt and starting the process of putting her in a nursing home. Not that I don't love her, I've just had enough. You can start being a daughter again, not a caregiver.
Check with your local senior center or center for aging and see what assistance is available. There are new community organizations popping up all over such as STAYING PUT, RSVP, etc that are service organizations -- seniors helping seniors, churches that have companion volunteers, etc. So check these out.
Maybe your parents could afford some help during the day for limited hrs or assistance in the evening a few hrs.
If you have to work, parents could move to some senior housing depending on their level of independence and these places charge rent on sliding scale or are subsidized.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Are you now staying home with them 24/7? That is an almost impossible job for you. Taking care of one person is difficult enough much less two. And if finances are tight in-home care is probably not an option.
Depending upon their health they may need a nursing home. I'd suggest an assisted living facility but they are way too expensive. A NH will accept Medicare and Medicaid. Have you given any thought to placing your folks in a nursing home? I know it's not what you want to do but how much longer can you keep supporting them? Don't ruin your finances, your credit, or your life caring for your parents.
If they don't contribute financially they should start paying their own way. If the don't have the funds then you should have them apply for welfare, food stamps etc. Any social services that are offered should be put in place
However, I did not go far with this, yet, as I don't need it, yet. So I don't know how much Medicare and her supplemental actually covers. Also, I was planning to see what the hour limit would be, as I would not assume 24/7 home nursing care without checking it.
And to answer your question, both of their Soc. Sec. should be going to you. I think that you have been generous enough.
Maybe your parents could afford some help during the day for limited hrs or assistance in the evening a few hrs.
If you have to work, parents could move to some senior housing depending on their level of independence and these places charge rent on sliding scale or are subsidized.