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I took her to the Dr and there is no infection. I closed the bathroom door as an solution, but she gets very upset, that she will leave for ever. No matter is you try to keep her busy, the bathroom is just an obsession. Please give me some advise what to do. It's so frustrating.

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Do you go with her to the bathroom? When we first started taking care of my mom we were allowing her to go to the bathroom herself. Well I stopped doing that when I realized that she likes to take toilet paper out of the trash, old depends, forgets to pull down her pants before peeing, etc. Anyway, she used to go to the bathroom a lot too (the one place she could be alone I suspect) but now that I go with her every time she only goes once every couple of hours, granted it seems like it's when I'm cooking or just sat down to eat LOL.
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Oh my gosh, my mother does the same thing. She is constantly going to the bathroom and not going. When I say something she just gets mad and says she can't help it she feels like she has to go. I've tried using depends, but she won't ware them. Our water bill keeps going up, finally realized it was flushing the toilet a million times a day. When you find a solution, please share.
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My mom is the same way. I am very interested in suggestions from others.
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When we had this problem, we found medication was not the way to go. Either made her constipated or dangerously groggy when she staggered down the hall. What we did, after hearing from her Center Care Manager, was not make a big deal out of it. Apparently there will always be some kind of obsession with some patients, and this was hers right now. The good new was, she moved on to another obsession AND there is usually only one at a time. LOL!
So, we didn't make a fuss. I put up a sensor light for her at night, and disconnected the toilet bowl chain, even turning off the toilet water tap, AND a large sign "please don't flush". You will need to go in a check every few hours to make sure the toilet doesn't clog.
On the positive side, she isn't very active so we did feel as least this is a bit of exercise. I know it's hard to think of it in a positive sense, but like with children, if we make it a problem, then it tends to compound the issue.
Silly me, now that we have experienced so many "obsessions", I sometimes think "gee, the toilet going one wasn't so bad after all". Hang in there, try to see it through and hope the next thing won't be more difficult to deal with. :-)
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My sister, in the early stages of dementia, goes to the bathroom at least once an hour, sometimes more often. I hadn't realized others did this too! It IS a fairly innocuous obsession, as obsessions go. Thanks for putting it in perspective.

My sister doesn't flush, so there's no water problem here!
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Oh boy, that and the toilet and tissue obsession. I noticed that my mother went to the bathroom every few minutes while waiting for the bus for the adult center. She gets anxiety easily, she is by nature a worrier, she worries she will have to go once on the bus, okay, it is hard because you have to rearrange her clothes. She will do this after a shower, after you get her all dressed. I know she drinks enough tea to make her peeing make sense and a lot of water too. I thought, maybe this is also a UTI. She got bronchitis and was on a run of antibiotics, so this would clear any UTI. However she was checked at the doctor and had a kidney infection, so go figure. There is something that my mother will always do obsessively, compulsions galore. When she gets something in her mind, she may forget everything a minute later, not the current obsession. I think after checking her for UTI, it may be nervous behaviour, makes you crazy because she just might have a UTI, arggh.
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The voice of experience, lol :) is that blood pressure meds can make you pee like crazy (personal exp here) as can caffeinated beverages tea and coffee. Also ALL antibiotics do not target UTI's that is why a culture and doctor visit are necessary and why a kidney infection could still be lurking after a round of antibiotics.
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Yes, I was thinking about this with the antibiotics. They found my mother's kidney issue with a urine test, first few negative then a positive one. You could drive yourself mad with it all, is it bp meds, sure could be, could it be tea tea tea, water water, sure, it just puts us on another rollercoaster at the fair, one of many, how's about some doctors who also prescribe water pills with bp meds, talk about LOL, madness.
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I know mom can do this too. It seems to happen more when she stands up. She can sit for long periods and not obsess about it. Guess she doesn't have too much on her mind because of the dementia, it is something to do.
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My mom goes to the bathroom often. She was tested for UTI and she had one. She was put on antibiotics but she still goes often. My problem is that she uses so much toilet paper that she clogs the toilet and it floods the bathroom. She uses the hand towels to soak it up and then leaves them sopping wet on the floor. I've been trying to give her privacy and allow her time in the bathroom alone. She does wear Depends. It's frustrating and she's only been with us a short while. I'm thinking if she was just flushing I'd be okay LOL
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Gosh, guess I won't complain about my mom, she doesn't do that, PinkLA. Blessings to you.
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tlhanger, I think that at various times we all have a right to complain
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Hello mommyinpa. I'm sorry I have no help for you, other than to let you know that this is very, very common in dementia patients. My mom had Alzheimer's and spent her last year in a nursing home before passing away. She used to have the same issue. She had to urinate every few minutes. She was seen by a urologist, and had all the tests. The only BP meds she took were the same she had take for years, without any problem. They never found a cause, and it never stopped. It was not an innocuous obsession as she was in a wheelchair and required two caregivers to take her to the bathroom. It was difficult and took a while. Then as she would be wheeled out of the bathroom, she would already be asking to go to the bathroom again. They put depends on her, but it made no difference, since she just behaved as if they weren't on. She would get anxious and agitated, and try to get out of the chair. (Dangerous situation.) I felt so bad for the nurse aids there, especially as there were two other patients in the same unit with the same issue. Everyone involved was miserable.
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BTW, they tried the Detrol and the Ditropan with Mom. Have they tried that with your mother?
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My mom is in her 60s and mid stage alzheimers , she always needs to go to the toilet ( but doesn't actually go and just repeatedly flushes it)
The main reason is driven by anxiety. Often she doesn't know what she is meant to be doing or what is happening next and so saying she is going to thetoiletmis almost like a safe distraction for her.
A first I would constantly tell her she didn't need to go again etc this this approach just caused more anxiety.
I basically just let her go as often as she liked, after about 6 months (!) this annoying habit actually almost stopped.
Occasionally she will have an episode but usually only on bad days or when there is a visitor and she is anxious.
I am now much more relaxed around her needing th toilet and in turn his seems to have relaxed her.
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I have to speak from experience here, I have suffered with severe panic and anxiety attacks and for some unknown reason, you do feel like you have to pee frequently and you are scared to death you are going to pee your pants if you don't. It is horrible but there is no way to stop it, it is part of anxiety.

My mother has recently acquired the anxiety part of dementia and she has to pee frequently and breathe fast and shallow. It drives me crazy, but 22 years ago I was doing the peeing and fast and shallow breathing, now we have traded places.

I believe this is all part of the disease and we just started Mom tonight on medication to see if we can get some sleep and peace.

Good Luck to Everyone
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My mom has the same problem. She's always had a nervous bladder but recently she's been disabled by gout and needs my help to transfer her from wheelchair to toilet. She is going every 1-2 hrs, 24-7. Its driving me crazy because I'm completely sleep deprived and get no rest. I don't know what to do.
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This happened to my Mom when she was in hospital. She had surgery and we thought it had to do with that but Mom was having to pee every 5 minutes, no kidding. I thought we were going to have to leave her on the pot because by the time she was back in bed she had to go again. They did an ultra sound of her bladder to see if it was indeed holding any pee and it was, it was not draining out completely when she went. They put a catheter in and what was inside her filled an entire bag! They did not want to leave it in very long because they say it can cause incontinence if they do. They removed it and later in the day had to replace it again for one more day and then it was out. There was no infection and no one knew why it was happening but she was upset and agitated about being in the hospital and they had tried her on drugs to calm her but it made her worse.

I personally think that my Mom's bladder may be tilted or has fallen and I don't think she is able to void entirely, but since she came home she has not had a problem with the 5 minute peeing.

I would call the doctor immediately and ask him if there is something you can give her to stop the sensation or perhaps meds that stop the OCD behavior but I would ask about doing the ultra sound just to make sure her bladder is empty and not sitting there ready to burst!!! I felt bad that I was getting upset at Mom and her bladder was full to the max and we did not know!
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My Mom had a stroke in 2010 and is paralyzed on the left side. As she cannot stand I have to get her in her chair, off her chair onto the toilet then back onto the chair and then back onto the couch! I've had back surgery, knee surgery and have fibromyalgia and the incessant peeing is a pain in all the above. She is constantly having a UTI....its gotten now to where she pees in her diaper which she started wearing about 3 weeks ago. Then she constantly thinks she needs to go have a BM but doesn't go once back there! She is getting weaker and cannot stand up enough for me to pull her clothes back up without holding her up and pulling clothes at the same time. Its killing me physically and emotionally because I find myself loosing my cool, and sometimes yelling at her to stand up and lean over towards me so that I can get her pants up! What is so bad is that there are times when she can do it just great and then the next time she won't so it kind of feels like she is just doing it. Oh, and every day its....."Just put me in a nursing home"....which I refuse to do!
Sorry so long...I could go on and on......but I just need some suggestions from those of you that have been here and done this!!
Thank you,
Rita
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sorry I posted a question where I was suppose to answer....
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Rita, it sounds like you should start to consider the residential home situation, otherwise you aren't going to be around long, and mom will go in the home anyway because you won't be around to stop it. It is time when you can't do it anymore, admit that to yourself and then it will get better.
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My dad just started this after a bladder infection. He did a course of antibiotics and was fine. About a week later he started to use the bathroom every time he sat down so he wasn't eating. It's been a week and he goes constantly. It is really frustrating because he seems normal except for this bathroom obsession. I feel like well be celebrating Christmas in the bathroom!
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LoriMb, does his doctor know this is going on? Does you dad have dementia?
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He is 94 so normal short term memory before the bladder infection. He was able to see movies, go to dinner etc. seeing the doctor again tomorrow. It's just so unreal to have that happen so fast because of a bladder infection.
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I went through this with my mum a couple of years ago, it was so frustrating and every minute. It seems it was a phase though most likely due to anxiety that she might wet herself ? It passed after a few months and now it doesn't happen at all.
Because I was becoming so on edge and focussed on the fact she was going all the time ( telling her she had just been, shutting the door etc ) it was actually making it worse. So as hard as it was I just ignored it and let her go 50 thousand times of that's what she wanted. Suddenly she wasn't anxious anymore. I didn't comment or make an issue around the toilet.., maybe give that a go for a while. If it isn't an infection as it wasn't with my mum, then it most likely is anxiety around the fact that she might be restricted from using the toilet.
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His doctor needs to get involved to rule out other problems that might create the same pressure sensation as having to pee. Make sure he's not constipated. It could be a prostate problem too. Only the doctor can know.
Adult undergarments (if he's not already using them) can provide a lot of comfort. There's a reason the old people call them "confidence products" - at least in my family they do!
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Yes Lucy Boo, I also tried to bar the door it was so frustrating. Sherman Oaks ER took his blood, said it was fine and sent us home. I took him to Cedars and had him admitted. I knew he had a uti but this was beyond that. I think it's a combo of enlarged prostate and anxiety/ dementia over feeling like he has to go. I hope you are right about the confidence products. Your suggestions and comments are unbelievably helpful and comforting to know I was not the only one that has experienced this wacky phenomenon!!!! Thank you to you both!
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It would probably help both of you for him to see a urologist.
There may be meds that can help the discomfort of an enlarged prostate, which might be the best goal vs. trying to solve the root cause of an enlarged prostate.
A specialist is worth their weight in gold sometimes, and it sounds like this is one of those times. Let us know how it goes!
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I'm a care giver and I am dealing with the same problem. My client has been obsessed with this so her dr recommended that we start catching the pee and letting her see how little or how much she goes. My client says she's scared to pee on herself and she does use poise pads .but still wants to get upset.so I'm trying to stay calm and not let it be an obsession with her.its hard yes and I wish she never got this disease..it has taken so many good people that never did anything wrong in their lives , God bless all those who deal with this all day .and prayers someone finds a cure.
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I have to laugh out loud at the doctor's suggestion to show her that she went. You simply can't use logic with dementia. It means nothing when the person's brain is changing and can't understand what their eyes and ears are capturing, or the signals from the rest of their body.

The usual advice is to distract and move the person into a different activity when they start to obsess. This is harder to do than it sounds.

My mother was OCD about it. She wore 3 pads and 2 pull ups at the same time. She walked like a toddler with a full diaper on and that wad in her pants actually hindered her mobility.

I tried telling her that everybody in the building had the same problem and it was no big deal. Accidents happen to everybody and nobody will think anything about it. Too rational. Didn't work. She called me a liar.

This phase will pass, but nobody can say when unfortunately.
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