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He’s had dementia for maybe five years or more. He’s been in a nursing home for over a year. Recently he started calling me ( yes he still has a phone), constantly in a panic. He’s getting paranoid and hallucinating. He’s having night terrors and calling me all through the night. He keeps begging me to come get him. He says they are doing things.


Most of it makes no sense but I can tell he’s frightened and upset. I can’t keep driving there to calm him down. I ask the facility to go calm him down but it doesn’t seem to help. Has any one gone through this? I had my father in law in a facility and he didn’t have a phone so maybe that’s why I didn’t have this issue with him. I am at a loss. I feel like I’m letting him down. I feel bad but I’m exhausted .

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Has he been tested for a UTI?

A sudden change in mental status is a medical event which requires medical investigation. Please call your dad's doctor and make sure they start by looking for an infection.
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Salsdaughter Jun 2023
They always do a UA to check for infection. They were supposed to start him on antibiotics just in case. Haven’t gotten the results yet from the test. Thank you
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Might be time for a mild anti-anxiety med at bedtime.
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Salsdaughter Jun 2023
Yes he is on anti anxiety. The nurse just switched meds recently because the other wasn’t helping.
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If he is on a cognitive medication, maybe time to discontinue it just to see if what ITRR is correct. There is also medication for hallucinations and night terrors.

The Nurses do not make the change unless they are Nurse Practitioners. Does Dad have a Neurologist? If so maybe you should take him to see him/her. Or ask that one be brought in to see him. A doctor connected to a NH is usually a GP. IMO GPs know a little about everything and a lot about nothing. With Dementia you need a Neurologist.

Time to lose the phone. The staff should be able to help him. Maybe a sedative can be ordered for when he is like this.
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Your Dad is in care. If you insist he keep a phone it is time to turn your own off at the times you need to. It is relatively in recent times that you have phones attached to our hips. Otherwise have the phone removed from him except at certain hours when you wish to reach him.

Have a conference with his care facility about other concerns as I doubt the phone is the only problem. He may need assessment by his MD for some medication to help his anxiety.

Sorry you are going through this and wishing you the best.
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Salsdaughter,

I agree with barb and loopy and would like to add;

My granny was put on an Alzheimer medication that gave her night terrors and hallucinations. Once she was removed it took a couple weeks for things to settle down for her.
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Yes every time it gets bad like this they do a UA. I haven’t gotten the results of this one yet.
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Sounds like a general progression of dementia. We removed my step-mothers phone from the room as she kept calling us and asking if we called her.

She is in MC and has sundowners.

She is doing fine without it, if something happens the facility calls us. If we want to TT her we call the MC's main number and they go get her.

So much better for all of us.
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Have him tested for a urinary tract infection. These can produce all the changes that are occurring. Part of his panic and anxiety may be due to sundowning or another stage of dementia.

Arrange a meeting with the nurse practitioner as soon as you can. He may need a med change.

Good luck!
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