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His performance as health care poa and legal poa has played a major role in my health deterioration. He does not even ask what the dr said. I have to come and go in a taxi. I went in a taxi 50 mi to go have major back surgery all by myself and 3 weeks later, came home to a disaster mess like I had left it and never contacted me or my surgeons in the hospital. I called and told him I had some post-op complications and still had them for about 4 weeks after I got home. I stay by myself 24/7. I don't have a car. Due to dry mouth, my teeth have had to be removed and my doctors and my dentist wrote letters that I was not a denture candidate. Implants is all that would help me and my osteoporosis all over. I asked my POA could he help with some of it. He makes $400,000 by himself and his wife makes 6 figures too. I made $12,000 last yr, soc sec, HE IS NOT GOING TO HELP, BUT MY POA PAPERS STATE THAT HE IS TO SEE TO IT THAT MY MEDICAL, HEALTH CARE INCLUDING DENTAL NEEDS ARE TAKEN CARE OF. I was in the hospital 3 times already this month. No word from him. Can he not be prosecuted somehow for his neglect? I can prove it.


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Your medical POA is not responsible to pay your medical or dental expenses. It is not the POA's responsibility to keep records or arrange your transportation. the POA would make medical decisions on your behalf if you were unconscious or cognitively unable. I am in a nursing home and on dialysis but I take care of my own record keeping and I am responsible for paying my own bills. I pay my own ambulance fees when I have to be transported. My son and my stepson are my medical POA's but they don't take care of me and hand have NO financial responsibility to pay my costs.
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You sound competent, so POA likely is not activated yet. Change your POA and contact elder services for assistance with what you need. The Area Agency on Aging is a great resource.

Are you using your health to try to get ex involved in your life again? There are other solutions other than an ex to help you.
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You can change your POAs selection at any time.

He is not neglecting your health, you are. He has no obligation to pay for anything or do all the things you seem to believe he does.

A POA document can NOT make anyone financially responsible for you or your needs.

They also don't have to be accepted by the person you assigned this responsibility too. I would say his actions say he isn't acting as your POA.
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A POA does not obligate them to use their own money to help you with your expenses. Their role is to handle your finances and medical decisions while you are incapacitated. You are confused by the role a POA does for you. They are not required to provide transportation or money out of their pocket for your needs. A POA document is for decisions to be made on your behalf when you are unable to make those decisions yourself. I was my mother's DPOA and when I had to handle her finances it came out of her checking account. I also had to make medical decisions on her behalf based on what she would have wanted. I was never legally responsible to provide transportation or use my money to pay her bills. A POA can also revoke their responsibilities to you and you can appoint a different POA if you are not satisfied with the one you have.
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Profile Cont:
I was in the hospital and recovery hospital, nursing home all together 5 months. He was to sanitize my whole house before I came home for good. I thought it had been used for horses and a pasture for both. I had to stay in the nursing home and he never did do anything about it. They let me leave the nursing home for 3 hrs every day, WITH A PICK LINE IN, and I took a taxi home, used a gown and gloves and mask, left all the windows unlocked and raised for 2 weeks before I could even stay here. Cats had no food or water, but they sure had a nice 1,000 sq foot bathroom, i can't pay a lawyer, but this is a story for Dr. Phil maybe......kidding....ccan u help me?

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Why on earth is your EX HUSBAND your POA? And why are you expecting him to take care of you and to pay your bills? Not able to get a 'denture' but 'implants only' is senseless: 100% senseless. It's the other way around, for people with osteoporosis and bone loss!! When there's not enough bone left to support teeth, implants are impossible and dentures are the ONLY alternative, that or being toothless.

You are wanting to prosecute a man who you're divorced from 15 years already, trying to keep him on the hook for health care AND finances THIS long after a divorce! It's pretty shocking, really. After a divorce is finalized, the relationship is FINISHED. If your ex wants to resign his POA, what makes you think he can't do that???

Your best bet is to find someone else to agree to be your POA and to then understand they are there ONLY to make decisions for you IF you are unable to make them for yourself. That's all. Nobody is going to agree to pay your bills or to take you back & forth to doctors/hospitals/dentists, or clean your house or anything else.

I'm sorry you find yourself in such a difficult position, health wise. I pray that you can hire a case manager or someone else to help you with everything you're trying to handle alone. I do not think your ex husband is the person to do that, OR to be your POA moving forward.

Best of luck.
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I wonder if you’re confusing at least two separate documents: one is a divorce settlement which lays out responsibilities and liabilities of each spouse; the other is a POA. Is it possible you are mixing the documents up or verbally lumping them all into one? It sounds like you might need a lawyer to advise you on your divorce settlement
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A Poas legal duty is to make sure your needs are taken care of with your Own money and to interface with the government on the programs they provide you. That’s it. His money is not involved.

You can certainly retract his poa for any reason, but he doesn’t have to provide you with 50k dental implants or any other expense out of his money.
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debra1956, I read what you had written above and on your profile. Lot of things just don't make sense. Such as you having Life Estate living in a house your grandparent's willed to you. That doesn't make sense at all. Life Estate means you are able to live in the house, but once you pass, an heir will take over, which means your grandparents Willed the house to someone else. But aren't you the heir?

Your took a taxi to the hospital without anyone being with you? The hospitals here require someone to be there with you, and be available to take you home.

Your reference to your teeth doesn't make sense, either. In your profile you mentioned your teeth got bad due to infections, which probably means you needed root canal work. Then you said the cause was dry mouth, which can be corrected with over-the-counter mouthwash and toothpaste. Curious how a dentist can do the work without knowing how you are going to pay?

As for having your ex-husband, whom you divorced 15 years ago and whom has moved on with his life, as your Power of Attorney. Even the best of divorces, rarely does one do that. If one has no one else to be their Power of Attorney, the attorney could be their POA, but at a fee. And yes, your ex-husband can step out of the role of POA at any time, even verbally say or even by text.
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JoAnn29 Mar 2022
Gum desease causes infections and deteriorates the bone. I had to have my gums slit open too and the bone scraped. Has nothing to do with root canals. Has to do with allowing plaque to billed up and bacteria setting in.
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Hi debra - I am sorry you are in such bad health. Your ex is not obligated to do anything for you even if he is your poa which he is not as he has resigned. You are mistaken that he is responsible for you in anyway. He is not.

I hope you can get the help you need from some place else.

Ask the hospital for a case worker to help you find resources.
Call Agency on Aging in your county
Ask your doctor
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Your POA is required to see that your "medical and health care including dental needs" are taken care of *within the limits of the resources available to you.* Nothing obliges him - and certainly not his wife either! - to put his hand into his own pocket and pay your hospital or dental bills.

I'm sorry for all you're going through. If you aren't satisfied with your ex-husband's performance as your POA, you'd better cancel it and appoint somebody else. Next time you're in touch with your PCP or your hospital, ask them to refer you to a social worker for general advice on support with managing your healthcare.
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