The oxygen is paid for by my mother's Medicare. I have heard that my sister's use of my mother's oxygen is illegal, but I can't find any way to report it. I have been at my mother's house on two occasions when there was an electrical outage and my mother's concentrator stopped working. She needed the tanks or could not get oxygen.
If she has a medical reason to use the oxygen she should be getting her own.
It's not like you can get high breathing oxygen (sometimes I wish that were possible😁)
Is your sister a caregiver for your mom? Are there any other things missing? supplies, drugs?
Is it possible to put cameras in so you can monitor the use of supplies?
Can the extra tanks be locked and only be unlocked when you or some other trusted person changes the tanks?
To report the theft of any supplies would just like reporting any other theft but with something like this if you have video proof that would make reporting much easier.
Issue one:
1. Is your mother living in your sister's house, or vice versa, or what's the arrangement? Is your sister her caregiver? Or her dominatrix? Anyone who steals oxygen from her parents to me falls in a negative category.
2. WHY does your sister need oxygen? What are the conditions that require it? Has she requested it of her own pulmonologist or other doctor? If not, why in the world not?
3. I do believe it is illegal to subvert a critical need from the person in need, especially when Medicare is paying for oxygen to your mother and not your sister. It's probably Medicare fraud. It's also elderly abuse. How in the world did this start?
4. What's your mother's situation? What's her pulmonary condition? What level liter flow was she on? Is she cognizant of the fact that her daughter is siphoning off her oxygen? Or does she have dementia and isn't really aware of her daughter's action?
It would be helpful if this information were added to your profile.
5. You could just come right out and report the abuse to your mother's pulmonologist or whoever prescribed the oxygen, but emphasize that you need to find a way for your mother to get the oxygen while stopping your sister's abuse.
6. You could report it to the police, or APS (probably a better immediate source), again emphasizing the deprivation of a critical need to your mother.
7. You could make an anonymous report to the county health department, or a state APS or Elder abuse agency. Google your state's home page and search for elder abuse, senior care or something like that.
Issue Two: emergency preparedness
1. The medical oxygen supplier should have proved a backup in the form of battery operated portable oxygen. We had this, with originally 4 batteries lasting a total of 8 hours.
Even though this helps, when there was a multiple day power failure, I had to find another place for my father to stay until power was restored. This was worse than finding a needle in a haystack. I called hospitals, ALs, senior center, police, fire, Salvation Army and I don't recall who else. Relief came from a wonderful Senior Center staffer who found an AL which would provide care for free.
The issue of backup oxygen is one which was unresolved when my father was on oxygen. It's a real shortcoming in the continuity of oxygen care for patients in need, or at least it was a few years ago.
Other than getting backup batteries, and trying to arrange to go someplace with electricity, I don't have any good answers.
If you consider a backup generator, be aware that you'll need an electrician and someone to connect to gas lines. And it's expensive, very, very expensive. The justification might be how often power failures occur. If they're repetitive, a backup generator might be considered.
I am considering reporting this to adult protective services, but APS has not been very useful in the past.
You say she "self-diagnosed" her need for oxygen, but then she got a script after an ER visit, so that doesn't sound to me like self-diagnosis.
Maybe you could help her secure her own oxygen, then she can stop using your mom's. If she got a prescription, then I'm guessing she must need it.
I was at the ER visit and heard my sister dictate her diagnosis to the technician there. He did not contradict her and seemed to passively agree. I did not object because I wanted my sister to obtain her own oxygen instead of taking my mother's. My sister also wanted to take oxygen with her on her flight back to Michigan.
She did replace the oxygen she used, so my mother is not in danger if there is an electrical outage, as long as whoever is in the house with her connects her to the tanks. I did not recognize the new seals the company put on the tanks, but I know they aren't the same tanks that were there four months ago.
If she needs O2, she sees a Doctor & gets her own. Simple.
This is not just selfish - this could be attempted murder.
I would call APS for sure, although it will be hard to prove.
I agree, your sister is putting Mom in danger. Hate to say it, but if your sister thinks this is alright, I wonder if she has some mental decline. I would call APS and run it by them.
She should also have a pulmonary eval to determine if she really does need oxygen, and if so use her own prescription.
Suggest that she study backpacking and camping at high altitudes and how to acclimate. Even at 73, it could be helpful for her.
Sorry to write this, but something's truly amiss if your sister is using your mother's oxygen and depriving your mother (and hers!) of the oxygen she needs. W/o being critical, I'm wondering if your sister does suffer from oxygen deprivation and it's depriving her of thinking clearly.
Thank you for your suggestions but my mother is at the mercy of my sister and no one seems willing to help. The government, as usual, is a waste of money.
Even if you can't change your sister's behaviour, continuing to protect your Mother's safety is still the priotity.
Who else knows how many O2 bottles there needs to be in reserve & checks this? Are there visiting home care nurses you could inform?
Is taking the O2 the whole promlem here? Or is this the *sister came to care for Mother/plans to take her house* maneuver that entitled siblings think they *deserve*? Is that scenario a real concern to you?