This is a follow up to a previous post back in 2023. I am getting worse when I see my husband of 55 years in SNF. He was diagnosed with mix dementia but has always been a mentally abusive alcoholic.
I am on an antidepressant but I am still having issues seeing him. I know morally it is wrong, but I just want to leave the situation and move out of the state. My grown children do mostly everything for their father and I just visit.
I am 80 years old, in good health and would like to enjoy what time I have on this earth.
Stay or leave?
https://www.agingcare.com/questions/dont-want-to-see-my-husband-484411.htm
Why do you go see him? Stop going. This is called a healthy boundary. If your children don't like this boundary, too bad for them -- they'll get over it.
If you are his PoA, resign. If he doesn't have a PoA then social services can get him a court-appointed legal guardian. This guardian will do everything for him: oversee his medical care, pay his bills, manage his affairs. Even your kids can stop orbiting around him, if they want.
I wish you clarity, strength, courage, wisdom and peace in your heart as you move onward and upward.
Walk away! Leave! Do not stay!
Enjoy your life!
Today here the weather is so beautiful, it should be considered a sin to not have a smile on are face , with the beautiful day nature is giving us today.
If not now then when? Go enjoy yourself
I think you should leave especially if you have given 55 years of your life to this man, an abusive alcoholic (I have lots of experience with a situation like this and I'm 82).
It's time to take care of you, to live and enjoy your life. Please leave.
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