I'm on the mend after major surgery for cancer. As I do better, I am working on preparing for the future, getting things in order that need to be faced. I respect that my parents did just that and want to follow their lead, in that I truly want to think about my funeral arrangements, burial arrangements, living will, etc., and try and get things in place ahead of time. I don't know what's coming down the road, though am ok, able to work and care for myself for the time being.
I've approached both my husband (husband and I are estranged, living in the same home) and adult daughter and neither is ready to discuss this. Otherwise, I have an adult son but don't know that he would be open to discussing this; he pretty much keeps boundaries with immediate family and I'm pretty much the only person he communicates with regularly.
I can and will do the prep work myself, make arrangements, and get things in place.
My thoughts are that I just want somebody in my family to know what my plans are and to talk about it with them.
Suggestions will be much appreciated. Thank you.
Dr. Gross
Thank you. Namaste.
If only for that niggling detail of living beyond my financial ability, and being alone ... : ) But your info/book is part of my new job of research :) I feel sorry for myself, but also I'm quite excited to take on this challenge! : )
You gotten a lot of great advice here so I won't repeat it. It sounds like the main issue is you can't get your family members to listen to you and interact with you on this topic. No matter the stage of life getting your end-of-life items together is always a rational thing to do.
I recommend bringing up this topic every few weeks to desensitize them to this topic. Plus, you can also recommend that they should work on their own end-of-life papers. This will help them to separate your working on these documents from being about your cancer. We never know when our time is up.
*hug*
P.s., fellow members, unless you don't know me, I recently removed myself from being primary caretaker for my 87 y/o mom. I had no support from either sib, so I had to save myself. Yes, it was dramatic of me, but I gave them 30 days notice to figure it out between them. It was all very businesslike, no expression of emotion or opinion, just the way our family always functioned.
I'm moving slow on looking into this, using being too busy with work and such as an excuse. I tend to move slow but I will get there eventually.
Lots of information goes in this book for loved ones when we're gone.
We can't escape death, so why not be ready.
Glad you are feeling better after cancer.... Stay strong.