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I'm looking for ideas about where to look for someone to give mom a shower at home. I've googled, I've yelped, I've used Agingcare of course and a place for mom. The handful of agencies around me have minimums of 2-6 hours and also a higher rate for those minimums. One even advertises no minimums and that they can do a 30 min visit, yet they told me it was a 3 hour minimum on the phone. So right now, it's looking like $100/shower. Is that just how much it costs?


I'm avoiding picking random people on CL. I tried asking a social worker but she suggested that I ask around people I know to see if they knew of anyone. I'm also thinking about dropping by the local senior center and asking them. Any other suggestions?


Alternatively, do nursing homes, AL facilities, etc offer shower services? Is that it a possibility that I can drive her there like an outpatient?

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Where I live, there was an agency that provided shower help for $49 per. (I say "was" because we stopped using them early 2017 prior to Dad's hospital stay and subsequent move to MC.) There is also a nice adult daycare nearby that offers shower assistance within the scope of the daycare services, which were reasonably priced (something like $50/4 hours).
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The hospice we use offers palliative care too. They charge $50 for a CNA to shower. I asked once when I thought that mom might be released from hospice.
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Ask mom's doctor if he will script a "bath aide", i.e, someone to come to the home to assist her with showers.

https://www.medicareinteractive.org/get-answers/medicare-covered-services/home-health-care-benefit-part-a-and-b/types-of-home-health-care-that-medicare-will-pay-for

Your loved one would need to qualify for other services, like skilled nursing to qualify for a bath aide.  But it is worth asking about, IMO. 
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Thanks for the responses. Unfortunately, she doesn't have a medical need so medicare will not pay for it.

I'll try calling daycare and hospice places.
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I too am interested in this. What does CL stand for?
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Is there a reason you don’t bathe Her ? Is it a tub, shower ?
Is there a safety concern. Grab bars, chair non slip surfaces ?
There are 100$ reasons to do it yourself, self respect, closeness, and you get to know what’s going on on the body, sores, rashes, you never know what. Plus an intimacy, you can clean and massage necks, rub feet and check nails. Trim them, all soft an clean. Shampoos are very relaxing, take your time. There’s no shame in love.
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my oldest sister does my mom ..i even did her but she is kinda worse now ..i am sure you have a family member that is female & would be able to do it .. if you have to offer them less than 100 $ that is to much maybe even a neighbor to my mom had me take her to buy a shower chair you can get that to at a handicap store or medical supply store ..it you are like us & got a small tube then take measurements before you go ..
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barbbrooklyn’s response.  needto, bathing is an activity of daily living and if she can’t do it by herself I would talk to her doctor’s office again. Try to keep the language more general, she needs support taking care of her health needs.  The doc should be able to prescribe home nursing visits (which are quite short, I think about 45 mins.).  First you could call some of the agencies that are nursing only, not CNA, and ask for advice as to whether and how they get assigned through Medicare.  The ones I called for advice were all really willing to provide guidance.  Good luck!
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The care available varies widely by area, but you might contact your Area Agency on Aging. There is a place here called NEMO(NorthEast Missouri) Senior Services. They provide us with a personal aide for 3 hours a week and only ask for a donation of $4.50/hour. She is not CNA but she can help with bathing and light house work. She's not qualified to do anything medical, but she is bonded and background checked.
The director told me that the program is partially covered by a grant from the Agency on Aging. That's why they only ask for a small donation. I feel really fortunate to have this available. Hopefully you will be able to find a similar program in your area.
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Corinna, in this context I think CL stands for Craigslist. If you are unfamiliar, it is a website for free classified ads.
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corrina - CL stands for Craigslist :-)
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you can try to enroll her in medicaid & when you go to fill paper work out ask them about it have to go to a welfare office or google to apply for medicaid that might help to get you to the right place ..but when you get medicaid then you can have a caregiver come out for 4 hours a day for a week & ask them to give her a shower let them know what your needs are they will tell you to what they can offer
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Sounds like you need to put her in a nursing home since you can't handle bathing your own mom--just wait until she starts pooping in her pants -- she will require a LOT of showers to do a thorough cleaning (otherwise she can get urinary tract infections because stool gets up her private parts). I'm sorry for sounding blunt but it's the truth. When they start pooping in their pants somebody has to clean her and it sounds like you can't do that since you can't even shower her. Seriously get a social worker and put her in a nursing home. Unless you are very rich and can afford to keep around-the-clock workers in her/your home. Caregiving is VERY labor intensive, hard work and you hire people do not expect them to work for free. So get over your aversions and learn to bath her yourself or put her in a nursing home. If you have just a bathtub then you need to spend about $10,000 to get it ripped out and get a walk-in shower instead with metal grab bars installed properly ...been there, done that.  I spend about $100 a month on diapers, gloves, TONS of baby wipes, and ointments for butt care. Diapers are about 50-cents a piece and she goes through about 3 to 5 a day. Yes after she poops you have to clean her up. Alzheimer's is so bad, even when I put her on the toilet she gets preoccupied trying to grab everything around her she forgets to go to the bathroom, will refuse to go in the toilet and later go in her pants. So welcome to the world of caregiving. *My life savings is rapidly getting depleted because it costs me a fortune to take care of her* not to mention I can no longer work since she is a full-time job as she require 24-hour supervision and care. And the government is not going to help at all..unless you impound them in a nursing home after putting them on Medicaid. If she has assets you need to see an eldercare attorney and discuss spending all her monies on her care.  Needless to say since I'm not making money and spending my own money it is going to impact my own old age so I will become a burden to society when it is time for my old age because I literally scarified my life for my mom. I'll be homeless or end up in a nursing home. Oh well. Maybe the way things are going WW 3 will happen soon.  So it's a moot point.
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I bought an electric tub chair for Mom. It has been a big help. It cost me $400 (though some places have them for $700...).
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My DIL is a CNA in a rehab/NH. She was approached by the son of a former patient to bathe his mom 2x/wk for $25 each time. Win-win for both of them. Perhaps asking an aide you are comfortable with to do it. On the QT of course.
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oh, and do ask around. We found the most fantastic aide for Mom just by asking around. She was by Mom's side for 6 1/2 years until Mom pass 2 months ago.
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There are chairs that can slide from the outside of the tub to the inside of the tub. The chair attaches to the side of the tub. She sits down outside the tub, then slides into the tub, all while sitting down. Once inside the tub, there are shower hoses that are extra long, with the on/off close to the shower head for convenience. This might be sufficient for your mom?
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My mom cannot walk, only pivot. I found a large shower chair (sometimes called a bariatric chair) which extends outside the tub with 2 legs in and 2 legs out. (bought used for $5. I bought a 6-foot extension hose ($15 Menards) for the shower head. I put a chuck on the chair so she will not slip. I wheel her in the bathroom. we stand and pivot and sit on the chair. Now hoist her legs into the tub. She has a small tote with all her washing essentials. She loves it. She has her independence, I come in and wash her back, she can wash her privates and all is happy.
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Ask around at your hair salon, church, and office to see if anyone knows someone who works part time at a facility and would be interested in coming by your home to help with that task. I am sure there is someone in your neighborhood who may be willing to assist. Also, you may want to have grab bars installed. With my mother in law? I gave her the huge walk in shower (which is big enough for two people) and put a portable shower bench and one of those wands on the shower head. They also have these 'transfer bench' things that you can put across a standard bathtub where she can sit while she uses the shower wand. It's hard to get them up and down out of a tub.
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If she does not need medical attention, just help in showering, the suggestions of asking around is a great point. There is also a site, www.care.com where you can post a request for a caregiver and have them respond to you, or read posts of caregivers wanting to be hired. They will list their services as well as their pay rate. Plus, it will help you narrow in on people in your area.
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Your local Agency on Aging/state home care may help. Bathing and dressing should qualify as "critical needs". However need assessment done first. Fees on sliding scale, so depends on her income. Senior Center can help you contact this agency.
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When my mum was mobile, I use to book a handicap room at Comfort Inn, about a mile from where we live. It was there that we took advantage of the handicap shower. My mum LOVED it! Afterwards, I would go get us some lunch. Although, we only used the room for about 3 hours, it was a wonderful outing for the two of us. And, side note, if I booked the room during the week, it cost me approximately $45. ;)
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Moen Home Care series has several different bathing assistance items.

Moen Adj Height Transfer Bench DN7105 has wide third leg that nestles against tub outside so it’s very stable. If you have “garden” style tub in BA, this model can be raised up enough to clear over the garden height
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Your local senior center is an excellent idea. We do have programs that are grant funded, and pay is based on a sliding fee scale. Sr. Centers should also have background checked employees, who are trained and work for that demographic. Also, our hospital does do baths in their Arjo tub. I think for $17. Try those places. And to answer vonrock's question. You would think that a family member would be more comfortable. But in my experience, it is not. It is the opposite. A parent does not want a child taking care of them. For some, it feels like they are an inconvenience, and they are ashamed they cannot take care of themselves. We know that not to be true, however, they feel that their independence is going, and do not want to burden their kids. Not always, and if you a different relationship with a loved one, kudos to you and to them!
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put an ad up in your local nursing home to see if a CNA would like some extra cash.. Interview very carefully.
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You might hire someone for respite care for the3 or 4 hour or whatever and they do the bath & other things while you can have some time off so you are getting more for the $ spent.
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we have walk in shower,shower chair and i ordered an 8 ft long hand held shower hose that had on and off flip on the shower head and has fast and slow. it makes it easier for me to get my husband showered,the hard part is getting him talked into it,along with not wanting to eat hardly anything he used to he does not want to shower,its stressful because if he gets upset he throws things so i try to keep my voice low and loving.
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Although we haven't heard back from the OP so far, I wonder if the issue might be that her mother is too heavy for the OP to handle. Thus, she may be willing but unable to bathe her. Additional details of the situation would be helpful. I think the suggestion about using a handicapped room in a motel is an excellent example of "thinking outside the box".
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Our HomeHealthCare will asssit in the shower for no extra $$.. I just had to ask for assistance for my father.

The alternative is you can shower her. Or you can sponge-bath her using Aloe Vesta soaps (Foaming or Regular) - no rinse. If you use the Regular Aloe Vesta, it is 1 ounce to a gallon of water - some Hospice and HomeHealth will even provide it as part of their services. If she is able to do her privates, let her. This is what they do in the hospital and most likely nursing homes. I'm not sure about the NH.

I shower my DH whenever he is willing to get into the tub. I have a stool and I use a "shower wand" for wetting & rinsing. Otherwise I use the Aloe Vesta and sponge-bath him.

The only reason I didn't shower my Dad was because he was still cognizant and it would have embarrassed him for his daughter to do it. He didn't even let the 'lady' from HomeHealthCare do it. So I bought him a stool and we put in an adjustable shower wand bar and he was able to do it himself in the shower stall.

Thankfully, they only need to shower about once a week - but I think my father showered himself a lot more often.
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If you are in the area of Bonita Springs, Naples, Estero etc...Millenium House offers showers for their clients, it’s an adult day care that my mother goes to and I think this is a terrific service they offer. For outpatient they do not do that there. However, JT Private Duty will do that and they service Lee and Collier Counties in Florida. #239-896-6582. If you want to enroll your loved one in the day care treatment and have them showered while there, that info is:
Millennium House of SW Florida
Senior citizen center in Bonita Springs, Florida
Address: 8951 Bonita Beach Rd SE # 297, Bonita Springs, FL 34135
Phone: (239) 992-5513
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